It feels like she’s been stuck on pause in her life for months.
Ever since her heart was broken by the one person she trusted to never hurt it, it’s like time has frozen still, and she’s paralyzed by it.
She can’t see a future where she’s not in this desperation of pain, constantly gasping for air because it just hurts so bad.
She doesn’t know how she’ll ever be able to open herself up to someone again because he completely destroyed her – destroyed her trust, hopes, dreams, and love.
He changed everything she thought she knew about herself. She turned into the girl she swore she’d never be – desperate for his attention, lonely… pathetic.
She doesn’t know how it could get any worse, because pain like this can’t get worse, can it?
She spends her evenings with food, Netflix, and tears constantly.
She tries to put on her best poker face for her friends and family, but they see through her. They see the pain she’s in, and they tell her that she’ll move on, but she just doesn’t see it.
But that’s the greatest thing about life. When she feels like there’s no future for her… There always is. The pain starts to recede, day by day, without her even realizing it until it’s been a month and she hasn’t shed a tear.
She’ll go through cycles of missing him so much it feels like she’s dying, and then she’ll start to forget him – the sound of his voice, his laugh, the bad parts of the relationship. Forgetting sounds scary at first, but it’s so necessary in the end.
She’ll eventually be able to look back with fondness over the memories she did have, but realize she’ll never be that naïve again.
She’ll have walls built up, sure. She’ll even find herself wondering if she’ll ever date again… but she will.
Eventually someone will come into her life who is going to knock down every wall she’s built. He will penetrate the fortress of her heart, and she’ll realize that love really is worth the risk again.
That day is coming soon, I promise. Don’t give up on love, because it’s the greatest thing to experience – even the ugly parts.
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