I can run with the pack as much as anyone, but deep down, I’m a lone wolf. In my mind, people have a common misconception about being introverted, as it’s often described as simply another word for being withdrawn or shy. To me, introversion is more about not constantly needing other people around you and being completely happy to be on your own. Sometimes living in a world with billions of other people just gets… busy, and I just want to get away and hear nothing but my own footsteps and the sound of my breath.
I’ve had people think that I’m rude or perhaps believe I’m too good for them if I decline an offer to hang out, but really, you probably just caught me on one of my Lone Ranger days. A day when I need some letup from talking, and just simply read a book in a café or take a walk in a park. This is ‘me time,’ and when I need it, I need it. I love a big group hang or a one on one session too, but I’m not reliant on them every week. I like a good balance.
There are others out there – and I have no problem with this – who could never travel on their own, for example. The thought that you would go to a new place and have to get from the airport to the hotel by yourself is mind-blowing for some. Conversely, I enjoy moments like this. For some strange reason, I genuinely relish that chance to dive into something unknown without any help. A sort of test of my worthiness, if you will.
The biggest trial of my independence came in early 2016, when a recent split from my partner forced me to do something a little crazy, and that was going on a road trip by myself. Maybe it was because I’d been inspired by seeing Reese Witherspoon in ‘Wild’ recently and felt like an adventure, but the break up was the catalyst for my solo trip, and boy, was it worth it. You’ll probably find a million articles on how to plan a road trip, but honestly, just get in the vehicle and drive baby. The spontaneity and excitement were thrilling, and I feel like the fun is taken out when you start studying maps and buying provisions.
That said, I did think ahead in one aspect, and that was to avoid having to book hotels in advance. My escapade lasted five days, although at one point I was considering making it six months. I wanted a cute little RV that I could sleep in whenever I was tired of driving or wandering around unknown places. I found Campanda to be a good rental option, and my last-minute tactic was thankfully quite simple to do online. I actually got quite attached to my trusty old RV, and it was hard to give it back after all that we’d been through.
As well, reading ‘Zen and the Art of Happiness’ kept my mind occupied when I was resting, as I learned about finding value and joy not from external forces, but being happy with myself. Trekking off into the wilderness alone is an extreme option when you need space, of course, but it gave me such strength to know that although I had parted from someone, I was still my own person. I didn’t have to rely on anyone to make plans. The freedom of literally driving away from my misfortune and coping with it by myself, was something I’ll never forget and will always take with me.
So don’t be sorry if you just want to spend time by yourself once in a while. If anyone has a problem with it, then it’s their issue, not yours.
