If you have been in any sort of relationship that has ended then you’ve heard the famous “Don’t talk to him anymore,” line from just about everyone in your life. Maybe it comes from a good place, but it just gets annoying. Especially when you and your ex are still friends.
To me it seems kind of immature to just cut off a person who used to probably be the center of your life. Taking a step back to get over him is wise, but once you have, you can be friends. Everyone will tell you not to be because they are afraid you’ll get hurt again, but they are wrong. Sometimes you just need certain people in your life, simple as that. You can’t really give anyone a good reason to need that person, but you do and that’s okay. It hurts more to have someone in your life one day and not the next, then it does to continue to talk to them after they hurt you.
What people rarely understand is its okay to know how someone is and still be their friend. We do it with our female friends and don’t even realize it. So why can’t you know how your ex is and still be friends? If you know what to expect from someone then they can’t hurt you because there is no surprise.
The other way I look at it is this, everyone in your life is going to hurt you some way, some how, at some point. You will most likely forgive that person. If you shut out everyone who has or will hurt you then you will be all alone. Your ex isn’t any different, he is just another person in your life that hurt you. I promise there will be people that hurt you in ways worse than a boy breaking up with you. So be his friend.
Listen if none of that convinced you to try and be friends with your ex (only if you want to be of course) then think about this. Every relationship you are ever in doesn’t work out, until you get married, and sometimes marriages don’t even work out. So breaking up with him just means he isn’t the person you are going to marry. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be friends. In fact that’s a really stupid reason to never talk to someone again. If you try and make a friendship work maybe you will find that you have a best guy friend for life. Someone who knows you better than anyone and can be there for you no matter what.
Dating him was just one chapter of your life, maybe if you still miss him than he does belong in your life. Don’t let anyone tell you that it isn’t okay to be friends with your ex. There is no better person to be friends with because no one knows you better than then a guy you dated, you have history. If I had listened to my friends and family than I wouldn’t have my best friend right now, and I need him more than I’d care to admit or would ever tell him.
