You always new the words to say to keep me coming back for more.
I spent years waiting for the heartbreak to end. I was the “side chic” and denied it every day. I watched you fail as a father to your own child but for some reason still hoped you’d be good for mine.
My Mistake.
Every time she left you beaten, I was there for you to run to. I was there for you and your daughter. I stood by you while your charges kept piling up. I was there when you were down. I was there when she messaged me threats and hateful shit. I was there when she sent me photos and videos of you two together when you were “at work.”
I stayed up till 1am, 3am, even 7am, just so you’d have someone to go to. So you’d have someone to talk to. I took a taxi to your job and sat there until you clocked out so we could hang out for however long you could.
I never hurt you like you hurt me. I never retaliated. I never walked away.
That was me being your Ride or Die
I finally died. Atleast to you I did.
I can’t say I always hated it. Waking up next to you was something I loved. Seeing our kids mesh so well together made me love the thought of a blended family. And the sex, well we know that I’ll miss that. But I stocked up on batteries.
We had some good memories, they were just rare. But hey, that’s what happens with the euphoria from drugs, it only lasts so long.
I feel sad that that amazing little girl is living life without the father she adored so much, but I’m so glad you aren’t there to break her heart over and over. She isn’t around to see you stick shit up your nose to get through the day.I’m glad that she isn’t around to see you putting in no effort for her because you’re wasting it all on the wrong shit. I hope she is nothing like you when she grows up. But I’m grateful I got to be in her life before you gave up on her completely. She was one of the best things you had to offer, and now you have nothing.
This time was the last time I let you bring your toxic, cold heart, and empty soul around me and my family. You’ve given up and betrayed your own family so why should I ever expect you to respect me and mine? I don’t.
Never again will I let you have that hold on me. You were the closest thing to heroin, guaranteed. And now when I think I want to feel that high again, I remember the pain and struggle of withdrawal when I didn’t have you.
I will say I wish you the best in life. I hope one day you escape the darkness that you live in. But when you find your way out just don’t come towards my light. I’m way too bright to let you dim my shine.