You Were Only in Love With My Company

You blindsided me with your arrival. I wasn’t expecting you at all and it was unlike myself to be so accepting of that. I just couldn’t help it… I immediately fell under your spell.

Life with you made sense. I was happy, I was confident, I was head over heels. There wasn’t anything I couldn’t do; the world was turning in the palm of my hand. Conversations of a future turned into real-time planning and I could finally see a silver lining through the darkness in my life.

But then reality hit.

You weren’t in love with me. You were in love with my company, in love with the idea of not being alone.

I was your support system. Your shoulder to laugh and cry on. Everything you ever needed was brought to by me. There was never a moment that you weren’t cared for.

And yet, you still threw me away.

How dare you take advantage of my heart. The wounds you promised to heal have once again been reopened.

How dare you make me the bothersome issue. The only issue at hand is your lack of respectful treatment.

And how dare you  search for pity. You don’t deserve to be felt sorry for. You brought this upon yourself.

If you think I’ll hand out another chance somewhere down the line, think again. There is no amount of apology that will convince me to try again.

When you mess with a calloused heart, there are always consequences. Now, you’re alone again with no one to blame but yourself. You can try to hide the hurt all you want, but you can’t fool me. 

This time, I came out on top. 

I’m still standing. I’m still calm. I’m facing life with a smile on my face because my days of being your slave are over. 

Never again will you have what you had with me. And good luck trying to find even half that. You said it yourself- girls like me are few and far between. 

I hope the ghost of our past haunts you forever and reminds you of the huge mistake you made. 

In the mean time, I’ll carry on with my ever-growing strength. 

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Emily

A 23 year old born and raised in Florida, fell asleep to dream of Wyoming, and woke up in California. Fluently speak Southern, currently learning English. I sew things and take pictures of stuff. Beware of Pit Bulls- they will steal your heart.   Twitter handle: ejsmith_photog Facebook URL:

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