A victim is what they identify you as, but a survivor is who you become afterward.
People sometimes classify you as a helpless victim, but they don’t know all that you have overcome. They don’t know every battle you faced and every tear you have shed.
At first, I blamed myself for what happened.
I was unconscious and you took advantage of me. I went to the hospital because I was unsure of what happened. The results showed you assaulted me while I was unconscious. I was in physical and emotional pain from what happened.
No amount of anything could make me forget the way I felt.
But I don’t blame myself anymore. I don’t blame myself for the night terrors, anxiety, tears, or panic attacks because I didn’t cause my pain, you did. I survived through it.
I no longer hold myself accountable for the choices of others.
Every part of my very existence felt challenged as if I had to fight not only to stay alive but to keep myself sane. I was fighting the same demons that left me exhausted the night before.
I was wallowing in self-pity, embarrassment, and sadness until I finally decided that I was no longer going to be helpless. I decided I was no longer going to identify as a victim. I was ready to be a survivor.
What made me a survivor is the fact that I chose to fight.
My life is a direct result of never giving up. He didn’t steal anything from me that night. I took it as a challenge and overcame what they said I couldn’t.
Any battle willingly faced is a battle won. I never accepted defeat even when everything was against me. It changed me. It changed the way I loved, felt, and saw the world around me.
My pain taught me how strong I am.
You have to come to terms with what you endured and face it so that you can begin to heal and move on. You can’t feel ashamed for what you went through it brought you out and made you who you are today.
Eventually, I found my voice again. I began to see the sun and feel happiness again.
I embarked on a journey of healing and tranquility.
I started to cut out the people in my life who didn’t value everything I was becoming. I had to let go of the ones that were holding me back and dragging me down. I had to let go of the ones whose paths were going in a different direction as mine.
You must break the chains that kept you bound. You can’t be afraid to leave people behind when you're embarking on a journey of self-improvement and healing because it will keep you stuck.
When you finally decide to choose you, you are choosing life.
Put yourself first. Remember that every battle faced is a battle won against whatever demons you're facing.
You're not your experience…you get to choose how you live even after tragedy. Choose to win, choose to succeed, choose to love, choose to be kind and don’t ever stop fighting.
You are not what happened to you, you are whoever you choose to be.
