10 Struggles Of Being An Old Soul But Also Spontaneous At The Same Time

On one hand, we’re very old school – we feel like we just don’t fit in with this hook-up culture where Facebook is an attractive people menu and everyone has one eye wandering at the options. But on the other hand, we couldn’t be more spontaneous.

It’s like our head and heart are a paradox all within themselves. We feel as though we’re always going back and forth between searching for security, but also never wanting, or actually never being able to settle for a life that is “normal.”

1. Enigmatic traits rule our life.

On one hand we value stability, but on the other hand, we also require a lot of freedom in our lives and in our relationships, so it can get a bit tricky.

2. We have a lot of conflicting emotions.

At times we need some time alone to reflect but sometimes we’ll just need you to get us out of our heads. We’re often conflicted about what we want – it’s very hard to find the balance between our big hearts and our creative, constantly thinking minds.

3. We need freedom but…

We also need a lot of security from the people we surround ourselves with. If we feel secure with you but also that you give us independence, we will really thrive.

4. We’re unconventional in everything except our relationships.

In our personal lives, we’re very old school. If we’re involved with someone in any way, it means we feel a connection that goes beyond the surface level. Try as we might, we will never be able to have a casual encounter with someone who was romantically involved with, we can’t just “date” or “Netflix and chill.”

If we like someone, we really like them and we either get into a relationship where we know that we’re putting our time and energy into something that will ultimately pay off or end in a serious commitment… or we’re just not going to bother. We’re either 100 percent in, or we’re out.

5. We love old-school romance and dates.

Take us dancing, not grinding at the club dancing, but the old-fashioned dancing, cheek to cheek, and we’ll actually melt. The same goes with all the old-fashioned stuff, like calling us – (it’s sad that making phone calls is now considered a dying art) or picking us up for a date.

We need our romantic experiences to have a deeper meaning. So yeah, if we get romantically involved with you it means we won’t stand for communication that’s detached or impersonal. What can we do; we want and need real passion.

6. But our lives couldn’t be further from conventional. 

We hate the concept of how things “should be.” We couldn’t live a “normal” life if we tried. We have no desire to follow the pre-determined form which means we will never just accept something, we question everything and investigate things for ourselves.

In our careers, we see right through existing structures and methods, and all the ways they’re terribly inept and unnecessary. It’s our intolerance of how things are “suppose to be” that has sparked us to innovate the lives we actually want to live.

7. Communication is actually the greatest form of intimacy to us.

Communication is one of the greatest forms of intimacy to us. Old souls are very cerebral people. Hearing about your history, learning about the way you look at life, and how you understand the world around you based on your past experiences, is exactly what helps us to better connect with the person we’re dating. None of your stories are unimportant. We want to hear it all.

8. We also see the world and our life on a much larger scale.

We’re old school romantics at heart – even our constantly thinking, mind-numbingly introspective minds can’t stop us from believing in ‘the one,’ but we still see breakups and problems as a learning experience and consider our struggles as just a part of our overall journey.

9. Our lives consist of always searching for ways to improve things.

We see the potential for humanity and have a lot of faith and expectations so this can sometimes be the cause of a lot of pain and disappointment, but that still won’t stop our creative minds from making plans to execute our big goals and dreams.

We’re always thinking outside the box, for lack of a less cliché term.

10. But in our romantic lives, at times we need someone to ground us.

Sometimes our view of love and romance is too romantic, we can idealize and romanticize things too much and become let down by our own expectations. We love when someone can get us out of our heads and make us live in the moment.