He carries an instrument on his back while riding his bike to band practice. He’s kind of dorky and awkward, but he’s in a band. Score.
But here are some things you should consider before you decide to invest your time in this mysterious fella:
1. He’s probably in more than one band.
Watching your man make beautiful music on stage every once in a while is a nice idea, until you realize he’s in six bands and has on average three shows a week. Dark and musky bars will be your new hangout.
2. You’ll think you have an extensive knowledge of music… until he starts talking.
Who actually knows the names of three famous upright bass players? And what the f*ck is noise pop?
3. He’s probably a smoker.
The unofficial statistic is 4 of every 5 musicians are smokers. Further anthropological studies to follow.
4. He’ll want you to promote his shows.
Soon your friends will receive overwhelming amounts of Facebook invitations. They’ll call you out on the storm of notifications and you might start feeling like a groupie.
5. He’s probably broke.
Being an artist is a full time job, okay? Busking and underground shows that pay in beer and pizza is fun, but it’s not exactly lucrative. Were you expecting hotel rooms that you get to trash after shows? Nope, the afterparty is at Craig the drummer’s place.
6. He’s just so damn introspective.
Ah yes, the starving artist. Whether it was a poor turnout at his show last night or maybe he just can’t hit that high note like he once could (see number 3), sometimes he just gets in pissy moods.
7. He might not write a song about you.
Is that what you wanted? It might not be his style. Or you might not like what he writes about you.
8. And if he does write a song about you, it might be really bad.
Your feelings will get hurt, but you’re the emotionally stable one in this relationship. You’re going to have to pretend to like it.
9. He’ll want you to appreciate his art.
Compliment his art and do it without him prompting you to. This leads us to number 9…
10. His ego is fragile.
Hey, it’s not easy to put yourself out there. So just beware, you might say the wrong thing that will send him into a rapid downward spiral of depression. Or maybe he’s just PMSing.
But it’s not all that bad…
11. He’s great with his hands.
You can let your imagination run away with this one. He’s good with his mouth, too. And he’s got great rhythm.
12. You’ll grow to appreciate new types of music.
Wow, you didn’t know that band was considered noise pop. You actually really like noise pop. You still don’t know the names of three famous upright bass players.
13. Your support will mean a lot, and he’ll be grateful.
Like the Yoko to his John… okay, bad example. Like the Nancy to his Sid… sh*t. Whatever, you’re there for him and he’ll return that love.
14. He’ll bring new insight into your problems and relationships.
See number 6. All that self-reflection has to be good for something, right? You might not always like it, but seeing things from a new angle is so important.
15. You’ll get into shows for free.
If only you could tell 16-year-old you that you’re dating a musician. You watch him practice and go to shows for free. You’re so cool. And clubbing was getting too expensive anyway.
