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28 Signs Your Life Is A Romantic Comedy, Minus The Romance

Everything is almost right. You’re meeting cute guys in even cuter ways. Your friends are hilarious: every time you say “lol,” you are actually laughing out loud. And you’re clumsier than ever. In an adorable way, of course.

 

The problem? The cute guys never text you back. And when your hilarious friends actually give you good advice, you don’t follow it. Everything about your life is exactly like a romantic comedy, minus the romance. Because when it comes to love, your gut is at the bottom of the gutter.

 

1. You met a hot, adorable guy in an elevator the other day.

 

2. He helped you pick up your purse and didn’t even laugh at all the tampons and Tums he saw.

 

3. But he never texted you back.

 

4. Your first kiss with the last guy you were dating was in the rain.

 

5. . . . It’s too bad you were wearing a white shirt and your worst bra.

 

6. You live in a really expensive apartment. You can barely afford it, and it’s not fancy at all. It’s actually a totally run-down disaster.

 

7. And it’s always messy.

 

8. Your best friend is more quirky than you.

 

9. But her advice on love and romance? Terrible.

 

10. You’re extremely awkward, especially around attractive men. But not in a way that’s also kind of cute.

 

11. You hate this one guy so much right now.

 

12.  . . . He’s going to be your next boyfriend.

 

13. Your gay co-worker tells you what to wear.

 

14. And how to give a blow job.

 

15. But it seems that whenever you follow his advice, disaster strikes.

 

16. Like, when he told you to hum while you give a blow job, you hummed “Let It Go” from Frozen.