As the youngest of five children and having many friends who come from smaller families, it has become incredibly apparent that my family is different from the others. It’s not just that we all have strong personalities or that half of us can outdrink anyone in the neighborhood (we’ve got Irish blood) but instead that having so many people in your immediate family changes up the playing field that we think of as ‘growing up.’
From dinnertime conflicts with practice schedules; to getting ready for school with just two bathrooms; to planning for college and the coming of the big 2-1 for each teen – having a big family makes life anything but traditional nowadays.
Dating is no exception to the list of special experiences that come with having a handful of brothers and sisters. Here’s why:
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You’ll Be Interrogated At First
It’s not that the family assumes you aren’t good enough for the special girl in their lives, it’s that they rightfully have some questions for you. When meeting a smaller family, you only have to throw out a few answers for the curious brother or nosy mother. When it comes to a bigger family, though, you’re fielding questions from a bunch of different people who all have different lines of thought that they need satisfied. Some families are friendly, some are fun, and some are serious. All big families, however, will leave you feeling like you just had a two-hour job interview after that first meet and greet.
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You Can Make Mistakes
There have been so many boyfriends and girlfriends who have come and gone between each sibling that the parents have developed enormous sympathy for the guys and girls who have to brave quality time with them. They’ve have had so many children, in fact, that they’re comfortable with an accident happening every day, with an emergency always being on the horizon, and with good intentions often falling short. That’s life. You’re in good hands if you crash and burn.
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You Won’t Be Everyone’s Favorite
Just because you’re awesome doesn’t mean that you’ll get along perfectly with everyone in the family. There are just too many people, too many personalities, and too many opinions to make you a dead ringer for the title of Favorite Significant Other. Knowing this ahead of time can make it easier to relax – be yourself and you’ll probably end up with at least two big fans. You’ll just have to grow on the others.
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You’ll Have An Army To Fight For You
Once you’re welcomed into the family with open arms as a long-term partner to the daughter and sister, you’ll have a group of people who will do anything for you. If you need a ride to the airport, they’ve got you. If you need a recommendation for a job, you’re covered. If someone is bullying you at the bar, they better be ready to fight an army. Big families treat loved ones like their own.
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You’ll Never Want To Discuss Politics Or Religion
There are just too many opinions in there: Back up! Even members within the family probably know better than to discuss hot button issues amongst one another. While you may know that your girlfriend has certain tastes or affiliations, you’ll likely never know how strongly members of her family feel in any direction on a given topic. Stay away from politics, religion, or any other touchy subject when hanging with a big family.
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You’ll Need A Good Sense Of Humor
Part of the survival strategy of kids in large families is the development of a sense of humor. Harmless teasing is more common than polite conversation. Pointing out the flaws of others is a test in humility because wit will always be used to turn clever comments back on you. And if you struggle with sarcasm, be prepared to do a lot of innocent smiling. You’re going to be thrown into the thick of the jokes when you start becoming close with a big family. Have some comebacks in your back pocket for when you need them.
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You’ll Never Be Bored
Someone is always going to be doing something impressive at work, having a relationship crisis, or in “a mood” when you’re close with a big family. You may not know all of the details, but you’ll know that there is never a moment to rest because you’re either celebrating, circling the wagons, or simply being present for someone in the group at any given time. This is just one reason for why big families are so great.
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You’ll Always Be Welcomed With A Drink
I’m sure there are actual statistics on this that would prove otherwise, but I’ve never known a large family that didn’t like to throw one back on the weekend. It probably has something to do with dealing with all of those people – you’ve got to stay sane somehow, right? If you’re a fan of a beer after work or a family reunion complete with sangria and something stronger, you’ll always be in good company around a big family.
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Once They Love You, You’ll Mean The World To Her
A girl with a big family usually cares about what her brothers, sisters, and parents think. When it comes to whom she’s dating, though, the stamp of approval is particularly important. Once she realizes that they are really fond of you, you’ll bury your way deeper into her heart. It’s a win-win, man. Just hold out a little bit longer!
