Stonewalling is just as it states, becoming like a stonewall. No emotion, no responding, no…nothing. This is typically the first step in the bitter end of a relationship. Avoid stonewalling at all cost (if you want your relationship to last, of course).
Stonewalling looks like:
- A lack of eye contact
- Expressionless face
- Giving your partner the “cold shoulder”
When your partner is talking to you, make the effort to make eye contact. Express that you want to start over and change your own behavior. Open your heart to your partner to create a new foundation – building from the ground up.
When your spouse is communicating with you, respond with phrases like:
- “I truly hear you”
- “I understand where you’re coming from”
- “So what you’re trying to say is…”
Stonewalling doesn’t have to mark the end of your relationship. However, at this point, it will take a lot of soul-searching, determination, and unconditional love to move past this upsetting behavior.
Search within to change your negative thoughts and actions toward your spouse. Meet every encounter with a loving kindness, a fresh start, and a mindset of repairing and strengthening the relationship.
Remember the reasons you fell in love with this person in the first place and ignite those memories of “puppy love.” If you feel like your partner is worth it, make the effort to let down your guard and convey what you want out of the relationship. Set goals for your future together and state your ideal relationship together – without bring up the past.
If you’re going to pull this thing together, you must let go of any wrongdoings from the past. Practice forgiveness with your sweetie and with yourself. We’re all human, yet strive to be your best in your partnership together.