I deserve someone who isn’t afraid to commit to me and open themselves up to the opportunity to be loved, and that doesn’t put the idea of getting hurt in the forefront.
I need someone who won’t make me feel like a terrible person for caring about him or her. My heart is worth the love that I am always trying to give out. I don’t deserve to hear endless excuses, and then be ignored until you’re lonely. And I don’t deserve to cry myself to sleep some nights because my heart and head are in a constant battle.
I won’t settle for mediocre love, for one-night stands or friends with benefits.
I am worth so much more. And if I can’t stand up for myself and believe that then how can I expect someone else to do that for me in return?
So here’s a final goodbye, at least for now. I can’t force myself to stop loving you, just like I can’t force you to love me. I can’t control my feelings and I’ll have to learn how to deal with it in a productive way.
As much as I don’t want to, I have to close this chapter in my life. I have to move forward and see what comes next. Because if I keep rereading the same chapter of my life, it’s never going to change and I’m going to be stuck in the same sorry situation. Which I don’t deserve.
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