It is easy to love someone when everything is sunshine and rainbows. It is easy to be there when things are easy and life is in the good times. It is when life gets messy is when relationships are tested.
C,
We have gone through some of the hardest times while I fight my demands from the past. You have handled all that comes with this journey with such grace and strength. You have loved all of the brokenness and held me when I haven’t felt safe, until I do again. It was that moment that I knew my soul needs you.
I watched as you took a leap of faith and changed careers. You looked me in the eyes and said this will be better, I will be able to grow now and be the best I can be for you can be for you and me. I seen your fear and knew that I wanted to be your biggest cheerleader. Every second that you doubt your ability to make his work and every second you wanted to give up, but you didn’t because of he dreams that I have for our future. You pushed forward through the fear. It was in that moment I knew my soul needed you.
The moments that my chronic illness flares up and the pain is unbearable. You are right there, holding me and rubbing my back trying to comfort me. Asking where I want to eat, because you hope that comfort food will make it better. I can see the pain in your eyes when none of it is working. It hurts your heart. I see it, I know that you are trying to be strong for me, but I can see the pain in your eyes. I can feel your love for me. Its was these moments I knew my soul needed you.
Our love is not always sunshine and kisses. We have hard times that not everyone sees. There are times that I am not sure how you make it through with me. There are times I cannot see how we can keep going, but there are also times that I know I cannot give up on us. That I will never be able to give up on use because as hard as the hard times can be. The good times, the times that are sunshine and rainbows are the times that I live for.
I watch you on the boat, I see that smile of yours so big. The sunshine is hitting your skin and there is a true glow about you. You have a beer in your hand and you are cracking jokes. Your laugh is contagious. Your smile intoxicating. It is in these moments I knew my soul needed you.
When we are up north and sitting on the love seat, my feet in your lap. You look so at peace. Everything in the world is right again. We are spending quality time together. When I see this piece on your face, I knew the my soul needed you.
I promise you that I will never give up on us.
All my love Em