I want you to know you don’t have to keep being so strong. You don’t have to keep pretending everything is okay. It’s okay to not be okay sometimes. Crying does not mean you are weak. Showing vulnerability won’t make you seem like a bitch and admitting you’re hurt it’s okay too.
It’s not fair what he did to you. And I wish I could take away your pain. I wish this didn’t happen to you. Of the simplistic wishes I have for you, are a healed heart and not having to go through with this. But what I can promise you, is this feeling will pass. You will get over this, and you will come out better and stronger as a result. He’s the idiot for not seeing value in you. He’s the fool for hurting you. And you deserve better than that.
I know you want him back. I know you miss your old life. But what I can tell you, is there’s someone even better for you out there, you just slowly have to get through this. Go through whatever phase you need to, to heal. If it’s partying and sleeping around, go for it, get it out of your system. You do you. But eventually, the best way to heal is to focus on yourself. And instead of getting back at your ex or wanting to win him back, focus on improving yourself and attracting someone even better than him. Because that will happen.