True love is all the little things

True love is a lot of things, but the best way to put it is simple, it’s the little things. The little things you see add up to being bigger things. Coming from a girl who has only known toxic relationships, trust me when I say that when you go into a healthy one (relationship) after a handful of toxic ones it is the absolute weirdest feeling. It’s LITERALLY going from one extreme to the next.

It is true though, true love is seriously the little thing’s that mean the most.

True love is, making pancakes at midnight after doing the deed because y’all worked up an appetite, and chocolate chip pancakes sound heavenly. You are literally sitting on the counter in the kitchen looking at this man who is making you pancakes at midnight, he looks over at you and blows you a kiss while your hair is in the messiest bun and you are wearing nothing but booty shorts and his t-shirt (you know you are looking like a hot mess) but he thinks you look absolutely beautiful!

The little things like surprising her with tea when you hear her up in bed coughing because you know she has a cold and you just want to see her get better.

It may be just a small gesture but it truly does mean the world to her.

Planning a day that revolves around spending time together, surprising her with a coffee and taking her out for the two of you to get a Christmas tree together, planning a cute but simple lunch (literally surprising her with a sub), and playing her favorite board game with her because you love it when she gets so competitive. Then ending the day at your guy’s favorite brewery getting drinks.

I promise you, you have no idea how happy this will make her!

The tiniest thing is, going into a gas station and seeing a beautiful single rose and grabbing it because you know it’s her favorite flower and it reminds you of her. things like this make her heart flutter!

You know she’s a hopeless romantic

It’s little things like making her stay awake until midnight so she can open up the presents you got her on her birthday because you can’t wait for her to open it and you know she’s going to absolutely love what you got her!

It’s finding out she has had an absolutely terrible day and just wanting to turn it around and make her smile! So you go and pick up her favorite wine and make her favorite dinner and make her favorite snack for her because you know that never fails to make her smile! Take it from personal experience … She will cry!

Don’t worry though they are tears of joy!

Finally, true love is loving her even when you know the “baggage” she comes with, and you choose to stay and be with her through the good, the bad, and the ugly. It’s taking her in your arms in the middle of the night when she wakes up crying and worrying from the worst dream and letting her know she’s ok and reminding her it’s just a dream and that you love her with all of your heart!

She doesn’t want a grand gesture guys, I promise you it’s the little things you do that make a huge difference and impact on her.

To The Man Who Marries Me

I talk a lot about perfection in my writing, and how there is no such thing as perfection. Lately, I was thinking that maybe there is such thing as perfection… but maybe it just isn’t what people expect it to be. We grow up learning that perfection in a relationship is basically never arguing, never getting jealous, never getting on each other’s nerves. I’m not sure how this interpretation of perfect love came to be, but maybe perfect love is the complete opposite.

I am not society’s vision of a perfect woman in any way, shape, or form. Therefore if you fall in love with me, and you marry me please don’t expect that things are going to be this unrealistic perception of love, that everyone claims exists. All of those things I listed above that wouldn’t be qualified as “perfect” love, are things that you can expect will happen if you marry me.

I am clingy. I am jealous. And you are going to drive me nuts every once, and awhile.

I don’t doubt for a second that some of my qualities will also drive you nuts. In one of the other articles I wrote, (“I Know There’s A Girl Out There”) I said that I wanted to see girls comfortable to be who they are. I wrote that “I wanted to see girls with pimples, freckles, and scars”… This is my ideal image of what perfect love would look like. It would look real. It wouldn’t be warped and changed to suit what perfect looks like to everyone else.

I think Taylor Swift puts my thoughts into clear, concise lyrics, “Our song is a slamming screen door, sneaking out late tapping on your window,”. These lyrics sum up that all love is different, and perfect in its own way. If this scares you… if being a real human being and arguing, and not getting along 100% of the time scares you, then you should probably walk away now. This isn’t a happily ever after fairy tale you read when you were a kid. This is life, and as you may or may not have realized at this point in your life.. it is more like a teeter-totter. You can expect feelings to come balanced but sometimes’s more this, than that. You cannot be happy all of the time.

You might be thinking “Wow, this sounds really shitty”, and I can honestly see how some people might view it that way. After-all we did grow up watching Cinderella, Beauty & The Beast, and other fairy tale movies portraying how all’s well and ends well. After-all we did grow up thinking that a little blemish on our face was disgusting, or that a little extra body weight was abnormal. Am I right? Multiple Psychology tests have proven this vision of “perfect love” to be completely unrealistic, and perhaps even unhealthy. To broaden your spectrum of view on “real love”, check this out: http://www.rebelcircus.com/blog/according-psychologists-couples-argue-love/

Will we be happy? Absolutely.

Just because it won’t be this unrealistic perception of “real love”, does not mean we won’t be happy. I expect you to respect me, and my feelings enough to be honest with me, and if that means you have to tell me I’m acting like an ass hole then fine – thank you. Thank you for being honest with me.

Will it be easy? No.

I am a blunt person. Sometimes words come out of my mouth so fast that it is hard to stop them. I am clingy but I also like my “me” time. Basically, you can take your vision of a “perfect” woman and you can probably say that I am the total opposite. I talk a lot, I care too much, I will tell you not to get flowers for me on Valentine’s Day and then be upset when I actually don’t get them. I am a real menstruating woman, a real person, with real “imperfections” (if you want to call them that).

I can’t promise you that I will be an unrealistic perception of perfect, I can’t promise you that I will be an unrealistic perception of a woman. I can promise you that what we will have will be something we will have to work on, something that we will have to build, and something that will grow. I can promise you that after everything… after the fights, and the differences of opinion, and me annoying the fuck out of you.. that I will love you as a real man. I don’t expect you to be Prince Charming. But I do expect your respect, and appreciation, and most of all your love in return.

If that is too much for you… if that scares you, then I’m sorry but it just won’t work.

31 Ways Being Loved Unconditionally Is the Best Feeling in the World

When You Are Loved

Every time I open up any social media it’s a constant list of people saying they feel sorry for girls that want a boyfriend.

While I agree that having a boyfriend does not determine your success as a person nor does it guarantee your happiness, the want for a boyfriend is not a bad thing at all.

You have someone to talk to without judgment any time of the day, any day of the week.

You can bring out the good in someone and they bring it out in you.

When you’re ready to settle down, you already have your person.

The idea of having kids one day isn’t out of reach.

You have someone to support your hopes and dreams.

And you’ll never sleep alone.

Someone who gets your sense of humor and you can goof off with.

You can cook for them…

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