You may not be her first, but you can make damn sure you are her last.

“You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before, she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect—you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can…” – Bob Marley

Every girl falls into her own journey of discovering who she is. It’s not so much that she follows a unique path, it’s that she’s swept into it by life’s circumstances. A big part of that is love.

Some girls fall in love once, others twice, three times, or more.

Most of the time, she needs to meet more than one person to find out who it is that’s right for her. If you’re lucky, that might happen to be you. But before she could ever meet you, she had to walk through the darker tunnels of the past to finally meet you, the light at the end.

And if a girl’s truly right for you, you won’t put her down for having that past.

Yes, it might bother you to think of a time that it wasn’t your eyes, but someone else’s she was looking into. And, yes, it might madden you, even more, to think that she was treated with anything but the respect she deserves.

You might wish you could simply reach back and scoop her out of the past so that she wouldn’t have to endure any pain so that you could have her all to yourself.

And this isn’t because you’re selfish or controlling, it’s because you want to protect her from any past harm. But instead of taking that frustration out on her, transform it so that you can make her future brighter.

Don’t be the guy who wants to change her past; be the guy who wants to better her future.

Don’t be the guy who makes her feel bad for any mistakes; be the reason she never makes another one again.

Don’t be the guy who dismisses her for who she was; be the guy who appreciates her for who she is now.

Because the reason you fell in love with her, to begin with, wasn’t because she was plain and boring. She caught your eye because she was different from the rest, a force to be reckoned with. You fell for her because she didn’t fit the ordinary mold. And the more you try to make her fit yours, the further and further she’ll flee.

A girl can’t be contained.

In love and life, we become so worn down and jaded through heartbreak after heartbreak. We have a hard time believing in forever. But you, you have the power to help her go back to who she used to be when she believed in fairy tales. Prove to her that “Til death do us part” still stands strong. Show her that love can defy the physical limits of this world and transcend into something greater than that.

So don’t love her because you’re her first. Love her because you’re her last.

For more of Defne’s writing, follow her on Facebook.

4 Reasons Every Girl Should Model For A Boudoir Photoshoot

It’s promiscuous, it’s too ris-kay, whatever naysayers may say… DON’T LISTEN TO THEM! I recently did a shoot with my favorite photographer that completely pushed me out of my comfort zone, and damn am I so glad I did! I have to say, the last two weeks leading up to the shoot I was so nervous! I wasn’t losing the weight I had wanted, I had the worst breakout, it felt like everything that could go wrong was going wrong. The day of the shoot though… that day is the day all of those feelings went away. It was “The Day”!

I had learned a lot from this shoot, and this is why EVERY WOMAN should model in a boudoir shoot at least once in her life!

1. The ultimate sense of self – love!

This shoot is all about you! Go out and get yourself that sexy outfit you loved, treat yourself to a spa day! mani – pedi’s, facials, the works! you deserve it! pamper yourself and get yourself that happy glow! It will show!

2. You get a built in hype-woman!

You should choose a photographer who you feel completely comfortable with! The photographer I chose I have known for years, shes family! Needless to say I felt completely comfortable with her and boy can I say, BIGGEST HYPE WOMAN EVER! she was so encouraging and made me feel like a total baddie!

3. The power from within!

Theres something about the poses that your photographer will have you do that not only makes you feel like a bad b*** but not only that, but makes you feel like you can command a room. some of my favorites were in front of a window or sitting on top of a couch or playing on the bed!

4. The confidence boost

I promise you, once you see the finish product of the shoot and you get your pictures back… the confidence boost you will feel is like no other! It will have you thinking “omg is this really me?!?! I am hottt!!!”

Getting a budior shoot done is honestly so much fun, with the right photographer the atmosphere will be light, positive and all around just fun! This shoot is sure to have you feeling like a new woman! It’s also a plus if you have a significant other and you surprise them one day with a picture… trust me, you will thank me later! *Insert devilish smile emojii* Even if you don’t have a significant other and you just do the shoot for you, Girl more power to you!

Go Do The Damn Thing! udio

About the author: Ashley Denton is a creative artist who’s mediums include music, theater, dance and creative writing. This girl thrives on coffee, adventure and exploration. Ashley has been writing professionally for five years and editing for four. Ashley is also one of Puckermob’s newest editors.

Show Yourself Some Love This Valentine’s Day With These Mini Gift Ideas

To all of my single ladies out there, this one is for you!

As we all know Valentine’s Day is coming up VERY, VERY QUICKLY! This is the day where you and your someone special show each other just how much they mean to you (even though you should be doing that every day regardless if it’s V-Day or not).

If you are someone like me and completely #Single you low-key dread this day, but it’s 2021. Take this year’s Valentine’s day and show yourself some love! That’s right, take yourself out on a date and buy yourself some presents because you my girl, DESERVE IT! So here are a few ideas on how to show yourself some love this V-Day!

1. Take yourself out for a special dinner

Whether that be getting all dressed up and going out to a 5-star restaurant or ordering from your favorite Chinese restaurant and going home to eat it while watching a cheesy romance movie. Do whatever YOU feel like!

2. Buy yourself some flowers and chocolate

I mean come on, you are the only one who knows what your favorite flowers are, and what your favorite chocolates are! If you are doing it yourself you know you’re going to like what you are going to get!

3. Get yourself a little coffee pick-me-up

I mean this day is a holiday, I guess… BUT! That means that places like Starbucks and Dunkin will be holding new flavors and special goodies! Take advantage! Today is all about YOU!

4. SPA NIGHT

Nothing beats a spa night, honestly nothing! Get your butt over to target, and pick up what you need for a spa night at home! Grab a facial and some new nail polish and while you are at it pick up some wine and snacks.

5. Get yourself a little gift

scrolling on your phone and see a little necklace you’ve “GOT TO HAVE” or see the workout outfit that you have been eyeing went to clearance? Girl snatch it up! You’re not going crazy with your spending and you deserve it! You work hard and it’s been quite a bit since you’ve last spoiled yourself.

Being single on Valentine’s Day should not be looked at as being sad. It is an opportunity for Self Care. So love yourself, because that is something we forget to do a lot. And it is always nice to check in with ourselves to see how we are doing. And we should reward ourselves for all of the hard work that we do.

20 Building Block Songs For The Ultimate Self-Care Playlist

If any ladies out there are like me then you have a playlist for literally every event and emotion you may have. The first step for building an amazing playlist is figuring out which emotion or feeling you want to cater to. For myself, one of my favorite playlists is my self-care playlist titled “Rainy Days.”

This leads me to step two which is naming your playlist. This is all yours and just for you so have fun with it! What you name your playlist can be something generic and simple or you can put some thought into it and come up with something unique. When I think of my perfect self-care day, I think of a rainy day, there’s something about a rainy day that is just so relaxing to me. Hence the title “Rainy Days.”

Step three of building your playlist is finding your vibe. Each song on this playlist has some sort of special meaning to me, as well as keeping a similar tone throughout the playlist. Here are the top 20 must-have songs for your self-care playlist:

Issues – Julia Michaels

This song speaks for itself… we’ve all got our own issues going on, I mean come on, we’re only human.

2. I’m so tired… – Lauv & Troye Sivan

3. Paris in the Rain – Lauv

4. Dog Days Are Over – Florence + the Machine

The dog days are over baby girl, It’s time for a new beginning so get up and go after it!

5. Fast Car – Boyce Avenue

6. Shine – Benjamin Francis Leftwich

This song is just so pure, it truly tells us about true love… honestly you won’t be able to help but smile when you hear this song. I PROMISE!

7. 1234 – Feist

8. Come On Get Higher – Matt Nathanson

9. You And I – Ingrid Michaelson

10. Banana Pancakes – Jack Johnson

Just picture it! You wake up and look outside and you can see and hear the rainfall outside, perfect weather for a self-care day. You hear this song and make your favorite cup of coffee… BLISS!

11. New Soul – Yael Naim

12. I Want You to Know – Megan Nicole & Madilyn Bailey

13. Heart Break – Lady A

Girl you are so strong, you may have been hurt by someone who didn’t see or appreciate your true worth but you are coming back stronger than ever. You know you deserve the world and you won’t settle, so while you wait for the right one “Sleep like a queen in the California king” that you are in.

14. Queens Don’t – RaeLynn

This one doesn’t need an explanation. Girl, you are a QUEEN!

15. Beautiful – Bazzi

16. Bubbly – Colbie Caillat

17. Can’t Blame a Girl for Trying – Sabrina Carpenter

18. Fight Song – Rachel Platten

You may have been knocked down three or four times but you’re going to get up five. You are a fighter…

19. Postcards – James Blunt

20. Don’t Give Up On Me – Andy Grammer

Not only is this song an instant confident booster but the serotonin that is released when jamming out to this song is UNBELIEVABLE!

Now, these are just the basic building blocks of any self-care playlist, there are so many more hits you could add! The second and final step of building your amazing playlist is to have fun with it, and truly make it your own!

Note From The Author:

Hey ladies and gents! I would love to see what y’all’s self-care playlists look like, feel free to share your playlists on your Instagram story and tag me! @Ashley_Lee_Lee this way I can personally take a peek at them!

About The Author:

Ashley Denton is a creative artist whose mediums include music, theater, dance, and creative writing. This girl thrives on coffee, adventure, and exploration. Ashley has been writing professionally for five years and editing for four. Ashley is also one of Puckermob’s newest editors.

Why Taking Care Of Yourself Should Always Be Your Top Priority

As a culture, we have an annoying tendency to label those who value themselves and their well-being as selfish and vain. Self-improvement is practically a character flaw, and admitting to others that you actually like the person you are often feels like a shameful social taboo. Instead, we actively seek out negativity, and allow self-degradation to define every conversation we have.

The truth is, there’s a fine line between self-love and narcissism, and discovering the difference is one of the most important things you can do for yourself and those around you.

You Only Get One “You”

Life is short, and you don’t ever want to be pushing 90 and looking back on 89 years of insecurity. Happiness is what you make of it, and even if you don’t accomplish absolutely everything you set out to do, you can still transform your life just by maintaining a positive outlook. Take care of your body, take pride in your achievements, and value your contribution to the world around.

Self-Fulfillment = Self-Awareness

Loving the person you are and caring for yourself is an exercise in self-discovery. In order to make yourself happy, you need to have an acute understand of what makes you happy, and vice versa. Sometimes, the root of unhappiness stems from past experiences, and acknowledging who we are before and what we want now and in the future can create a huge difference in self-discovery. This could be challenging at first but with the guidance of the Alchemy of Origins, you can definitely find your truth of self-love and self-discovery.

Other Aspects of Your Life Will Improve

Self-worth is nothing if not a catalyst. Improving yourself involves improving every facet of your person, including your health, happiness, relationships, and productivity. Likewise, neglecting to do so will only ever hinder you. Learn more from LifeHacker Guy for his real-life experience, health wellness recommendations and reviews, and personal journey to self improvement.

You’ll Inspire Others

People often underestimate the influence they have on their friends, family members, and coworkers, but when you make a major change in your life, everyone around you will notice. Happiness is contagious, and when others recognize that yours stems from an improved sense of self, there’s a good chance several of them will attempt to emulate the example you’ve set.

If You Can’t Care for Yourself, You Can’t Care For Anyone Else

Your personal relationships are a reflection of the person you are, and those closest to you will recognize your capacity to love (or lack thereof). When you learn to care for yourself, you will eventually attract others who can do the same.