To The Girl Who Got Used To Having The Rug Swept Out From Under Her

If you’re reading this then you probably know the feeling I’m talking about. The rug was swept out from underneath you.

That feeling when you realize that everything you had believed in before just crumbled underneath you, the foundation you thought you built with someone suddenly disappeared, and your stomach is in knot and any excitement you had before has turned into an overwhelming disappointment?

I grew up in an environment of having the rug swept right out from underneath and worse.. falling on my ass. My relationship with my father always left me feeling as though I was trying to fill a void that he continued to widen.

You would think that after having it happen so many times growing up I would have learned my lesson; I would have learned which signs to look out for. But nope. I was blinded by love. A love that was so real that I thought it filled the void of my childhood. I thought that maybe, just maybe, not everyone would leave me on my ass.

But after a three year relationship that was the best of times and the worst of times, I can safely say.. I sit here writing this, again on – my – ass. Who knew that someone could have such little regard for another person’s feelings?

Except today I made the decision that this will be the last time that any man – family, relationship, or otherwise – will ever leave me feeling this way. I know the signs now.

The problem is that I was blinded by the same qualities that had originally hurt me. I fell in love with someone who needed attention and would do anything to get it, just like my father.

But girls need attention, too. I mean, come on… I thought that was a known fact. After three years of being in a roller coaster of a relationship, I decided to stop giving this toxicity my attention. It bit me in the ass. As soon as I wasn’t giving him my attention, he looked elsewhere.

But now I know the signs to look for. I can’t continue to jump into relationships with anyone despite how well I think I know them. Clearly the year I took ‘getting to know’ this guy was NOT enough. I’m taking things slow from here on out, no matter how long that takes. Ladies, we need to find partners who have backgrounds and goals and dreams that align with our own.

Gone are the days of sacrificing all of ourselves for someone else. It’s time we put ourselves first. No matter how long the ‘getting to know someone’ process takes, I promise it is more gratifying than being left out on your ass. Make sure that person can hate you but still respect you. Be so angry for you but still adore you. Be so hurt by you but still forgive you. And most of all, be all these things and still LOVE you.

We won’t be loved by anyone until we start sticking up for ourselves. It starts now. Bye bye, carpet!

51 Things Every Girl Definitely Needs to Do After a Break up to Forget Him

Coping After Breakup

Your worst nightmare happened: he dumped you. And it feels like your whole entire world is literally about to fall apart completely. You don’t know what it’s like to be without him and you’ve definitely completely forgotten how to rock being a single lady. I mean, you don’t even remember the last time you got flirty with a boy that wasn’t him.

Pull yourself together girl! Yeah, he turned out to be a total douchebag, but so what?

Sounds harsh, I know. But what I’m really trying to say is, it’s okay that he broke your heart….because even though it hurts right now it’s totally his loss. And you know what? He’s just making room for the right guy to find his way into your life.

So do whatever you have to do to forget him and whatever makes the hurt feel just a little better…no shame.

1. Panic. What. The. Fuck. Do. I. Do? 

2. Go ahead girl, eat that pint or two of Ben and Jerry’s when the tears come.

3. But, maybe the third pint of Cherry Garcia is an overkill.

4. Have a fancy drink with a little umbrella in it.

5. Go ahead and have another.

6. And another.

7. Okay…that’s it.

8. Fine just one more.

9. Call your girls.

10. Let them take you out on the ultimate “Single Ladies Night Out.”

11. Drink from a Penis straw at the bar…

12. And sing a horrible rendition of “Before He Cheats” at karaoke.

13. Make out with a stranger.

14. Or two.

15. Bring plenty of condoms when you go out.

16. Maybe have a steamy hookup in the bathroom of the bar.

17. Remember, he’s an asshole.

18. But drunk text him anyway.

19. Cry when he inevitably responds with something douchey.

20. Like….a lot.

21. Stop crying.

22. Man up.

23. Finish your drink.

24. Remember his smell.

25. Go out and buy his cologne (#stalker.)

26. Spray cologne on your pillow.

27. Cry yourself to sleep.

28. Write him a letter you’ll never send.

29. Write a stupid journal entry about your breakup.

30. Try to bury yourself in work.

31. But find yourself stalking him on Facebook.

32. Who the hell is he with?!

33. Who is she?!

34. Realize you’re so much prettier.

35. Call girls to reaffirm that you are, indeed, prettier.

36. Stalk that bitch.

37. Wind up on her Instagram.

38. Realize that you two would be besties.

39. Curse her.

40. Close laptop.

41. Open laptop.

42. Open Tinder.

43. Get laid.

44. Remember you love sex.

45. How did you forget?!

46. Have more of it.

47. Lots and lots of sex.

48. Get ‘bored’ of just sex.

49. Realize you want a relationship…

50. Bump into a sexy stranger.

51. …and…you’re over your ex!

An Open Letter to the Girl Torn Between Loving and Leaving

He Elates You Then He Deflates You.

What Gives?

He is your entire world. You think he could be the one. He makes you happier than you’ve ever been before…..some days.

And other days, the complete opposite. Love is an action. Each day he should be loving you by showing you how much you mean to him. It’s not always a big romantic gesture, but a simple phone call in the morning telling you that he hopes you had a good day, coming home to a clean house when he knows that you’ve had a long day, a good luck text before a big day at work…the little things that show his love on a daily basis.

Sweet girl,

If you’re torn between loving him and leaving him, think about these few things.

Are your friends and/or family constantly telling you that you deserve more?

How many late nights have you spent crying because his controlling manner brings you down?

Does he treat you like a queen? This doesn’t necessarily mean diamonds and roses (while those are definitely nice though!),it just means that he puts you first. He puts your wants and needs above his, he makes sure that you’re always happy and does whatever he can to keep a smile on your face.

 

An Open Breakup Letter to the Girl I Don’t Want to Go

Dear ________________,

I recently read that 88% of Americans believe breaking up in person is always necessary. While I understand the sentiment, expressing these emotions face-to-face is a challenging prospect for me at the moment. I hope you can comprehend the difficulty in finding the right words in such a delicate situation.

Where do I begin? Well you are by far the most beautiful person I have ever known. I love you with all my heart, and it breaks me to know that after such a short time together we must be parted. It was truly the happiest time in my life and I hope it holds the same significance for you, as it did me. It will be tough for both of us but you are strong, stronger than you know, and I know you will be okay with time.

There are too many memories to simply write down, from the silliest jokes to the most childish moments, to the most intimidate like reaching for you in the dark and the simple act of holding your hand while walking across the street. They are the moments I will treasure. You have helped me in so many ways, from the smallest thing to the largest. From the simple act of helping me conquer my self and my share of weaknesses. I can never thank you enough and my appreciation goes beyond what I can express.

And we had so much fun as well didn’t we? Everything from watching movies, (all mine being superior of course.) To the long walks and feeding the birds.

You are one of the kindest most loving people, I have ever met and it is a rare quality. I am so glad to have experienced it for even the shortest period of time. I would have been glad to experience any length of time, whether that be short or long.

There are so many amazing qualities about you, you should take pride in them, no matter who may try and put you down. Just know you are appreciated by all those people who come in contact with you. There is an air of innocence and goodness to you that seems to reach out to all those around you.

Your generosity seems to know no bounds and I truly hope you can find someone to match that. I have no doubt you will find someone better than me back home and I hope with all my heart you are happy. Where ever you end up and whoever you end up with. You are gorgeous in looks; personality, mind and I know you will find someone worthy to be with you, of that I am sure.

It feels strange writing this. It is surreal; the idea you must leave seems distant, unreal almost. But as I write this it is sinking in, my hand is going numb. I feel small and scared. I don’t want you to leave. Every fiber of my being says this can’t be real and this isn’t happening. I want to stop it, but what can I do. Oh how I wish you could stay. I would give up everything I have for it.

How can I say goodbye? I can’t. I won’t. I can’t say it here; it is beyond me. I am tearing up here and people are staring. I say let them stare for I feel no shame in my love for you. Thank you for everything. I will never forget you.

I love you with all my heart.

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Do it for the Revenge Caption

“Sometimes it feels better to be alone than to be in the company of one you love, but is not faithful & honest. For that is a person who does not deserve your company.” – Dominique Caruso

Do you ever think you made a mistake by leaving your ex when there was not 100% trust? YOU’RE WRONG.  Choose to be happy on your own; for when you are happy on your own… he will see it on instagram and probably be jealous.

Do it for the revenge caption.

All my love,

Dominique Caruso

 

It’s absolutely okay to leave a relationship where there’s no trust. Trust is a fundamental building block for a healthy partnership.

Here’s a more balanced response that focuses on your well-being:

You are strong for prioritizing your happiness. A relationship without trust can be draining. Choosing yourself is a brave decision.

Focus on healing and self-love. Being happy on your own is the foundation for any fulfilling relationship, romantic or otherwise.

Social media doesn’t define happiness. It’s great to share your life online, but true happiness comes from within.

Here’s a Dominique Caruso-inspired closing:

Shine bright, because your inner light is enough.

Remember, revenge isn’t the answer. Your happiness is the best revenge!

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