A girls guide to loving yourself through anxiety.

 

Self-care has been a major focus of mine in 2021. I am looking for more peace, happiness, and living my truth. That means taking care of myself. This is hard for those of us who are used to fighting everyone else’s battles and putting everyone else first. What I realized is that to keep up with all my responsibilities I have to put myself first. If I am feeling my best, it is easier for me to give my all and fulfill my responsibilities. However, we all know that we cannot be positive all the time. These are the things that I do to help bring myself back. Here are the things that I am doing to take care of myself.

Breaking down the time.

Sometimes the day is just too much. Let’s be honest sometimes it can be really overwhelming, so I have been trying to break down my time. Instead of taking on the whole day, I start to take on the hour. If that seems too much I take on the minutes. This has also helped me break down my to-do list. I have to work on being ok with not getting everything done, but this is a work in progress I am sure for all of us! Keep at it, and remember it will be okay and you will get through the rough patch.

Breath.

Breathing is something that I am not great at. When I am stressed I hold my breath which only heightens the anxiety and stressful feelings. This is also something that I am still working on. Recently when I have been feeling anxiety and it is becoming too much I take five minutes and sit in my bedroom in the dark and focus on breathing. This has been something that has really helped me and allows me to see that things are not as hard or as bad as they seem.

Exercise.

This is something that I have pretty much always been on and off with. I have been “on” with the exercise recently because I know that it makes me feel better. It gives me a win for the day if it has not been a great one. It allows me to give myself some much needed “me” time. It helps me to have more energy to get through every day. I find that the best time for me to work out is in the evening to end my day. I take a hot shower after and that seems to relax me and give me the downtime that I need to get the best sleep that I can.

Face mask.

Okay girl we both know that you have been eyeing that face mask that you have been wanting to try in the target beaut isle. Pick it up!! Yes, do it because you are worth that couple of bucks that you are going to spend on it. Make a night of it run a hot bath, light some candles, put on your favorite playlist, and put that face mask on. We both know that you will feel better about yourself. As you should because you are a queen and you should treat yourself because yes, life is hard but it doesn’t always have to be!

Take a Break.

This one feels a little non-authentic for me to be saying, however, this is something that I am actively working on. Working with children I cannot tell you how many times I have asked a child if he/she needs a break. So why shouldn’t I take a break if I need to? Sometimes emotions are too much and we need to take a breather to help us figure things out. This is okay. This is something that I am going to commit to doing more often. I hope you all will join me.

Get Ready.

Sometimes we all know that we would feel better if we just got up and got ready. Whatever that means for you. Take a shower and put some leggings and a big shirt on, pull your hair back and get to work on making your day great. Or maybe you need to do your hair and makeup put something you feel great in on and tackle the day. Whatever this means for you, do it. You can and will achieve things today, and you will be great. This also changes for all of us, so if today you feel like you need to feel comfy and tomorrow you need to walk the runway get it, girl. I am here to support whatever you need.

Girls Night.

Okay, so this one is hard right now I know. We are all socially distancing. But, we can make it work. How about video chats with some wine and good conversation. Do not underestimate your tribe! If you need them call on them and let them help you. Do not keep it all in.

Dance PARTY:

Throw your favorite playlist on, put some headphones in, close your bedroom door, and dance. Not only will it get you up and moving but seriously how can you be anything but happy when you are dancing. I am currently having a dance party while doing my hair and working on this article! Feeling pretty good over here! Thanks, Justin Timberlake!!

Walk.

My walks usually have a dog and leash with them. Today was a lot for me! So I put my headphones down (usually I listen to music while I walk) and just walked and reconnected with myself in nature. Yes, it felt off to just be still with nature but it was so needed.

Anxiety is hard to live with, I know. You never feel like it’s enough. The tailspin is so fast. Please do not stop taking care of yourself and remember that you matter. I know that it is not easy. Fight for the things that you need. I know you want to take care of everyone else, but that is not going to happen if you do not take care of yourself. Whatever your self-care is do something that will take care of you today!!

20 Things That Will Actually Help Alleviate Your Anxiety When It’s At Its Worst

Anxiety is not something that is easy to deal with—especially on an everyday basis. For those who suffer from anxiety and anxiety disorders, they know that coping with the illness when it is at its worst can be the hardest part. Trying to “talk yourself down” or prevent an anxiety attack can be near impossible for many individuals. That’s why some users on Reddit seek outside advice and help on the site from those who also deal with anxiety and all of its problems. u/sailorv1993 asked Reddit users to share what helps them when everything seems too much and, some of the responses will really help you navigate your own anxiety, too.

1.

I know a lot of times when I’m feeling super anxious about something my brain just flips the “everything is terrible and going wrong and nothing is right” switch, and it’s just a downward spiral. Learning to just let myself feel every emotion, even if I know it’s just the anxiety talking has helped me work through the attacks. Validate yourself and your feeling, let yourself feel whatever your brain is throwing at you, and then when you’re calmer you can sort through the emotions. It’s helped me a lot.

godoftitsandsangria

2.

Focusing on my breathing and then if that doesn’t work, physically stepping away/leaving the situation. Also carrying around a water and taking a sip when I need to ground myself

cmccx

3.

Music. Lots and lots of music.

Tylord2

4.

oddly enough, cleaning and organizing things/rooms.

makidee33

5.

Taking a lap. When I feel like the walls are closing in, I excuse myself from wherever I am and go for a walk around the block to get fresh air and a little exercise. If this isn’t an option, I discreetly take a benzo and do some breathing exercises (there are some apps that help if you aren’t familiar!).

vagsquad

6.

My friend got me out of a panic attack pretty quickly by just having me focus on my hands. Placing them on the table, raising above my head. It re-centers your brain almost like a reboot because for me at least a panic attack is when my anxiety gets so high my brain short circuits and everything is in overdrive.

pearljune1

7.

Meditation and deep breathing. It sounds cliche, I know, but trust me it works. Learn it.

bawzzz

8.

My big, 72-pound, rescue dog. It’s like he just knows when I’m having a hard time and will come lay with me… literally just came down the stairs to check on me as I typed this.

hermi0ninny

9.

Small, manageable goals. If I’m having a panic attack, I just have to accept that it’s happening and focus on breathing. It will always pass. If it’s looping thoughts or rising anxiety, I try to focus on factual positives. Things are rarely ever as bad as my brain would have be believe.

Smched

10.

Going in a bathroom and putting my hands under running water.

Thecookieisalie

11.

Grounding exercises are what I have to do when I get panicky count 5 things you can see 4 things you can touch 3 things you can hear 2 things you can smell and 1 thing you can taste. Then close your eyes and breathe slowly, rinse and repeat.

-Aurum555

12.

Sitting in the shower.

cayebaye

13.

I just think to myself: “But will I die?”

The answer is always no. I may be anxious about something, but I know I can get through it. It helps.

Aetas800

14.

Crying. I know it sounds weird but its instant relief for me. You just gotta let it out.

Ilikesticks45

15.

My wife’s heartbeat. There’s lots of little things that can help, but hearing that works the best.

urosko

16.

My worst anxiety occurs during inaction, so I look to do something marginally productive like sweep the floor, make a snack, or shave. Obviously this is useful if the anxiety is due to being overwhelmed, but it works for me when feeling anxious about less tangible things as well. Even the most insignificant or minute task is better than sitting in anxiety, but the more lengthy and involved, the better relief (and sense of accomplishment).

-username_offline

17.

I know this might sound stupid but what helps me is calling myself out. If I’m starting to get an attack I start to go through emotions out of nowhere like over thinking or just wanting to punch a wall for no reason. And when I’m feeling them I just say wait a minute Why am I mad in the first place that’s stupid of me. Or even just telling myself hey don’t be sad there’s no point. But if I forget to do this and I’m in a public setting I close my eyes and count to 10 and I even sometimes breath in hold my breath for 5 or 10 seconds and breath out like u would if u where using a inhaler.

Princessclaya2

18.

CBD oil. It takes the edge off.

zenaa21

19.

I have a conversation with myself. I ask why I’m anxious, reasons why I should be anxious, reasons why I shouldn’t, why I’m afraid, how I should deal with it, etc.

Then I just give myself a pep talk afterwards and give myself encouragement that everything will be okay and I’m doing my best. Sometimes it works but other times the anxiety is overwhelming so I just acknowledge it’s there and force myself to go on with my day and take deep breaths throughout and try not to get angry.

On the medication side, beta blockers has helped me significantly for super intense moments.

pineapplebuttface

20.

Silence and holding perfectly still. The latter is complicated by the need for oxygen, so I breathe as slowly and with as little movement as possible. After a minute or two I can usually segue to deeper breathing and carefully controlled stretching, and then to normal movement again.

Dandibear

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