Understanding Nets Cancer and Treatment Options

NETs cancer

Neuroendocrine tumors are a type of cancer that arises from hormone-producing organs. Since there are so many changes in our body under the influence of hormones, NETs cancer can severely disrupt the functioning of the whole body, leading to undesirable effects.

The treatment of neuroendocrine tumors requires specific experience, which is why many patients prefer to undergo therapy abroad. One of the most demanded countries for neuroendocrine tumor treatment today is Germany. Due to the high level of health care and the wide choice of modern hospitals, patients from all over the world come here for up-to-date examination and treatment.

NETs diagnosis

Neuroendocrine tumors can have practically any localization in the body. However, neuroendocrine tumors located in the pancreas, stomach and bronchi account for the majority of cases. Tumors in other hormone-producing organs are less common, but no less dangerous. Often, patients seek medical help at an advanced stage of NETs cancer, when they already have metastases in other organs.

In hospitals abroad, visualizing methods of examination like ultrasound scan, CT or MRI are used. For a more accurate diagnosis, laboratory methods are used that determine bioactive substances in the blood or urine. This makes it possible to increase the accuracy of the diagnostics, and also makes it possible to detect the tumor at an earlier stage.

Up-to-date treatment

Treatment method is chosen individually for each patient. The therapeutic scheme depends on the location, size of the tumor, its hormone-producing activity, as well as the overall condition of the patient. Surgical removal is still one of the most effective and proven methods of treating neuroendocrine tumors. If necessary, in addition to surgery, the physician can administer chemotherapy, targeted drugs and immunotherapy, somatostatin analogs, etc.

If we talk about more modern and less invasive methods of treating neuroendocrine tumors, embolization or chemo embolization are administered. With this, doctors can block the vessel that feeds the tumor, thereby stopping its growth. This method is very effective as compared to systemic chemotherapy, because it only affects the tumor without influencing healthy organs.

Best hospitals abroad

Among the great variety of modern cancer centers abroad, it is difficult to choose just one. To make it easier for patients who want to be treated abroad, a list of the best cancer clinics has been compiled. This rating is based on the statistics of successful operations, availability of modern equipment and treatment methods. The list of the best cancer clinics for innovative and effective treatment includes:

  • University Hospital Heidelberg
  • Mediclin Robert Janker Clinic
  • Helios Hospital Berlin-Buch
  • University Hospital Freiburg
  • Helios Klinik Krefeld

In each of these medical centers you will undergo treatment with state-of-the-art equipment and receive professional cancer care.

After the treatment, the patient stays in the inpatient department under medical supervision for few more days depending on the treatment method and the presence of health complications. The rest of the rehabilitation measures are chosen for each patient individually, depending on which organ is affected by the tumor and how extensive the surgery was.

Cancer treatment during the SARS-CoV-2 pandemic

Because of COVID-19, many countries have introduced quarantine and have closed their borders to foreign patients. Thus, patients from many countries are not able to undergo their treatment abroad.

If you want to receive treatment abroad during the lockdown, you can contact the medical tourism operator Booking Health. This is currently the only way to get treatment in the best hospitals abroad without obstacles. If necessary, the company’s specialists will help you receive a visa for treatment, as well as an invitation for treatment from the hospital and entrance permission.

Moreover, with Booking Health you can save up to 60% of your treatment cost, because there are no extra fees for foreign patients. You can find more information about neuroendocrine tumors and innovative treatment abroad on the Booking Health website.

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How to Use CBD Oil for Cancer Symptoms Relief

Cancer is a term used for diseases caused when specific body cells proliferate uncontrollably and spread into surrounding tissues. The disease is mostly associated with inflammation in body tissues. However, there are numerous types of cancer, many of which do not necessarily trigger inflammation. Regardless, cancer kills millions of people globally each year, and unfortunately, medical researchers are yet to find a cure for this debilitating chronic disease. 

Cancer is primarily a genetic disease, which mostly results from changes or mutations to the genes that control cellular functions. The most common genes affected are those that regulate how cells grow and divide. Genetic mutations can be hereditary. However, they could also happen spontaneously during your lifetime.

Certain environmental factors have also been cited as the leading causes of cancer. Examples include long-term exposure to chemicals, such as those in tobacco smoke, and exposure to radiation, such as ultrahigh rays emitted by the sun. And in rare cases, some cancers may be triggered by underlying medical conditions. As cancer is an umbrella term, each disease exhibits its symptoms depending on the part of the body that it affects. 

However, the following are some of the shared cancer symptoms to watch out for:

● A hard lump on or under the skin
● Bowel changes, including blood in the stool, stool discoloration, or chronic constipation
● Bladder changes, including frequent or infrequent urination, blood in urine, or urine discoloration
● Unexplained fatigue
● Unexplained bleeding (internally or externally)
● Persistent and unexplained pain, fever, or night sweats
● Weight changes, such as unintended weight gain or loss
● Skin changes, such as skin discoloration or sores that won’t heal
● Respiratory distress, such as persistent cough or difficulty breathing
● Difficulty swallowing 

The Role of CBD in Treating Cancer

Cannabidiol (CBD) is a naturally-occurring compound in the cannabis plant renowned for its potent anxiolytic and analgesic properties, making it an ideal remedy against anxiety and pain. Besides them, CBD has tons of other medicinal uses, including attenuating some of the cancer symptoms. 

Right off the bat, it’s important to mention that CBD is not a cure for cancer. The substance might only relieve some of the bothersome side effects of the disease, most of which occur once the patient has been diagnosed with the disease or during the treatment stage. 

It’s also worth noting that all CBD products are not made equal. To ensure that you’re getting the right quality products, always purchase from reputable suppliers. And while you’re at it, insist on Steve’s Goods CBN Gummies that were obtained by the COExtraction method, as well as products that come with proof of test results from independent laboratories. 

Ways CBD Might Offer Relief for Cancer Patients

1. Treating pain and inflammation

Most forms of cancer do not exhibit painful symptoms during their earlier stages. But the pain eventually sets in sooner or later. CBD comes with immense analgesic properties that might make it effective against cancer-induced pain. The substance combats pain by impacting some of the body’s pain-regulating receptors while also allowing the body higher access to its cannabinoids, such as anandamide. 

So far, research has established that nabiximols, a drug formulated with CBD and tetrahydrocannabinol (THC), might help to treat cancer-induced pain. In addition to treating pain, CBD might also alleviate the inflammation associated with certain types of cancer. The substance has anti-inflammatory properties that might suppress some of the body’s common inflammatory markers.

2. Relieving anxiety

Anxiety is another common medical condition that most cancer patients suffer from. There are always nagging fears to contend with many cancer patients, such as fears of developing complications or, worse yet, dying from the disease. Thankfully, anxiety also happens to be one of the side effects of cancer that cannabidiol can treat. Cannabidiol can relieve anxiety by improving the brain’s signaling of happiness hormones, such as serotonin. 

CBD offers the same benefits as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), with the added benefit that the compound presents minimal side effects. The best thing about CBD for anxiety is that the substance can benefit both cancer patients and their concerned friends and relatives.

3. Treating insomnia

The anxiety that most cancer patients face might trigger insomnia if it goes untreated. So, administering cannabidiol for cancer-induced anxiety might subsequently help to relieve insomnia. CBD has also been shown to shorten sleep latency while prolonging sleep duration. Another way CBD might fight insomnia is by reducing or eliminating rapid eye movement (REM) sleep, which is the sleep phase characterized by rapid eye movements and vivid dreams. 

Not only does CBD reduce REM sleep, but it can also relieve REM sleep behavior disorder (RBD), a condition that’s characterized by active behavior while dreaming. 

4. Relieving nausea

Nausea is a common side effect of specific cancer treatments, such as chemotherapy. Regardless of the severity, nausea can cause appetite loss and affect how you eat or consume your meds, ultimately reversing the gains made towards your recovery. CBD contains anti-nausea properties and might benefit cancer patients undergoing regular chemotherapy sessions. 

The FDA has since approved a THC- and CBD-formulated drug, Dronabinol (Marinol®), to treat nausea and vomiting induced by chemotherapy.

Conclusion

Cannabidiol is not the magic pill for cancer. In fact, the disease has no cure yet. However, CBD might make a massive difference in terms of relieving some of the worst cancer symptoms.

Here’s Your April Horoscope — As Told By Emoji

Please note: These horoscopes, like emoji, are meant to add fun and color to your month. Take what feels good to you, leave what doesn’t.

Welcome to Aries season! The ram loves to have fun and get moving, but this year she did not come to play. Get ready for a big, fiery burst of energy, and sudden influxes of information (bye-bye, Mercury Retrograde!). Depending on your mood and personal pace, this season could feel like a welcome relief from all the sloggy grief of Pisces season. It could also feel like too much too fast. Remember to take time for getting centered and settled.

If you’re an Aries, happy birth season to you! You in particular will probably revel in the fresh upbeat energy that abounds this month. But don’t get carried away with too much doing. Even you need rest. Look before you leap, and take aim before you shoot any arrows at your desired targets.

It’s possible for almost everyone to get a whole lot done right now. Whether it’s building a business, finding romance, or good old fashioned partying, opportunities abound this month. But the results will only be worthwhile if we make efforts to apply all this boundless ram energy in meaningful, focused ways. Instead of making headway in 15 different areas of your life, right now it’s best to pick a path that needs your love and attention. Focus on it, and forge full speed ahead.

Notable transits:

Mercury in Pisces will be sextile Pluto in Capricorn this month. This is a time when we all may be prone to do deeper thinking, especially investigations of truth. We might examine how powerful people wield their power, and how those choices help or hinder the greater good. We might uncover secrets or discover hidden motives. But it will be important not to jump to conclusions! We should not force or impose our will on others. Throwing your weight around this month (even if it’s in the service of what you believe to be truth and justice) will only yield chaotic results. Instead, it’s best to pay careful attention to power dynamics and engage in thoughtful discussions while setting firm personal boundaries. Mercury in Pisces can make us messy, or it can make us soft and non-threatening. If we lean into the gentle side of this energy, we may persuade powerful people in our lives and in the world to make important changes.

 

Aries 

Ooh, baby, it is your time to shine! The sun is beaming down on you and you are loving it! With your ruler, Mars, forming many favorable aspects this month, you may be amazed at how many opportunities and yeses are coming your way. This month could also offer you valuable medicine for healing old wounds. If find yourself getting bursts of inspiration, don’t forget to slow down and write down your big, bold ideas. As the sun shifts into Taurus season at the end of this month, you’ll want to put all you’ve learned to work. You’ll probably encounter an opportunity or two that challenges you. Don’t imagine these are roadblocks. They’re simply chances to see which of your ideas can get the tangible results you yearn for.

Taurus

This month, you may feel a booming sense of urgency. But the harder you push, the more roadblocks you’ll find. Frustrating as this may be, you’ll do best to go along for the ride, even if it feels more like a carousel than the direct flight you’d prefer. That’s because this month isn’t about your destination, it’s about growth. It’s OK to vent your frustrations regarding all these dead ends, but you’ll feel more at ease if you can open to the possibility that everything coming your way is in fact designed for your growth. Instead of focusing on forced outcomes, see if you can stretch yourself to respond to challenges in ways that nurture you rather than defeat you. Even if all you get is a heart that can hold more of what you feel, that will be something to celebrate.

Gemini 

This month offers you as much harmony as it does friction. You may simultaneously feel like you’ve come so far and still have so much to learn. But if anyone’s equipped to believe several things at once, it’s you. Try not to get too in your head, especially if you’re feeling prone to self-criticism. Instead, turn your thoughts to simple actions you can take to continue growing in one or two (let’s be real, no Gemini has ever chosen just one thing and been satisfied) ways that feel most important to you. Whether your concern is your relationships, your career, or all of the above, this month wants you to trust that you are getting stronger all the time.

Cancer 

Wake up, sleepy moon baby! This month the alarm clocks and roosters will be crowing in your ear to plant seeds of action. The new moon in Aries on the 5th gives you the perfect chance to shed any doubts you have about your ability to assert yourself. Sure, you may still have your insecurities, but that doesn’t mean you can’t focus on the things that make you feel cool and confident. The full moon in Libra on the 19th invites you to bask in the loving glow of your partnerships. If you’re unpartnered, this month still wants you to step into the warmth of romance. So buy yourself a bouquet, light those candles, and be your own dream come true.

Leo 

This month you’re torn between work and play. You may find yourself daydreaming about vacation while working, and fretting about how much work needs to be done whenever you manage to get outside and play. It’s possible to strike a balance, but it will take effort. Instead of focusing on whatever you feel you don’t have enough of right now, your best bet is to keep showing up for the present moment. Can you find a little more light and beauty in spaces that sometimes seem oh-so-gray? Can you give yourself the gift of showing up fully for friendships and fun even when you know your desk awaits you? If you can focus on being exactly where you are this month, eyes wide open, a little more light will find you.

Virgo 

Right now your spidey senses may be tingling. You tend to base your decisions in fact and apply yourself in careful, measured ways. But you also possess a powerful intuition and the planets are lighting it up this month. If you’ve got a hunch that a job, a friend, or a destination could provide a powerful connection or opportunity for you, you’re probably right on the money. This month the stars want you to shoot your shot! At the end of the month, take some time to review your dreams. Check off all the ones you’ve already made come true and remind yourself that you may be known as a taskmaster, but you are also several parts dynamite and magic.

Libra 

As the month begins, you may face many little challenges that add up to a bigger feeling of being stuck. At the same time, your dreams will be heightened. You will probably feel clearer than ever about what you want and what you want no part of. Mid-month, once you’ve taken stock of your dreams, you’ll benefit from using them to set firm boundaries. This month does not want you to people please, even if you happen to be very, very good at that. When the full moon occurs in your sign on the 19th, you may notice some of your dreams finally coming to fruition. Welcome your blessings and let go of any scenarios that haven’t played out as you would’ve liked. You can’t always get what you want, but the more you make peace with your disappoints, the more you’ll be able to enjoy all the wonderful surprises that the stars have in store for you as the month winds down.

Scorpio 

This month your ability to gather the information you need to make transformative decisions is heightened. You may even feel like you’ve got a bit of information overload. Don’t panic, though. Think of your brain as a stomach. Give it time to digest all the new ideas and revelations coming your way. It will sort out what you need and what you don’t in due time. Meanwhile, carve out space for beauty and relaxation. You may not be getting all the attention you want this month, but that doesn’t mean you don’t have plenty of secret admirers. Keep an eye on your inbox. You won’t want to miss it when someone special sends you a hello.

Sagittarius 

This month, your ruling planet Jupiter stations retrograde on April 10. You love the feeling of forward momentum, so you’ll likely resist this turn of events. But see if you can apply the same gusto and enthusiasm you have for spontaneous journeys to going back and reflecting on all that you’ve learned. This can be its own big adventure. Go back to your books. Polish up all the gems of truth you’ve discovered. See if there are any you left in the dirt. And if you find you absolutely must give your attention to the future, feel free to review all those great escapes you’ve been planning. Fine tune the details (you dread this, but it’s necessary). When you’re ready to roll again, the ride will be all the more smooth and joyous.

Capricorn 

You may find it’s easier for you to communicate your feelings this month. Use this to your advantage. You may want to have important conversations with people who matter to you, or who you might simply find yourself sharing your emotions more freely and more regularly. In either case, this month is a time to be more trusting and more vulnerable than your usual stoic self. There may be small challenges mid-month, but they pale in comparison to all of the love that wants to flow your way. Your biggest challenge will simply be to remain open. Let love in this month, and trust that more of it is on the way.

Aquarius 

This month is demanding you to buckle down and stick to a few key routines. You are easily bored by daily rhythms, but know that creating to-do lists actually allows you to build in some flexibility and achieve some of that inner peace you’ve been craving. Trust that your diligence will pay. You may also find yourself challenged by your romantic interests this month. Maybe you feel misunderstood, or your odd-ball displays of affection are flying over your loved one’s head. Be patient with yourself and with others. You may need to go back to the drawing board and translate your style of affection to suit those around you who have, well, simpler preferences than you. But if you put in the effort, you’ll be rewarded ten-fold.

Pisces 

Communication is key for you this month. Now that the long haze of last month’s retrograde has lifted, you’ll have opportunities to communicate your thoughts and visions far more clearly. Make sure you listen to your audience, though. You may have some powerful allies right now, but you’ll only know how much they can help you if you take stock of their goals and are careful to see how they best align with your own. You may not be able to save the whole world in one fell swoop, even if you’d really love to, but you can make serious headway right now if you streamline your efforts. Remember, being strategic is not the same thing as being deceitful. You don’t have to share all the details of your biggest dreams with every potential ally who crosses your path. But you can pick up some serious support if you tailor your messages to suit both your needs and those of the folks you’re attempting to recruit for your cause.

This article was written by Nayomi Reghai and first appeared on The Daily Dot.

Reflections On Losing My Mom to Cancer

You were gone, long before you took your final breath.

Little pieces went away, in miniscule amounts throughout your cancer journey. What I didn’t realize, is that I lost myself somewhere in there too. Little by little, bit by bit….. I became someone new. Not because I wanted to, not because I had any desire to change – but because that bitch made me.

You know who I’m talking about.

All of a sudden we found ourselves sucked down into Cancer’s rabbit hole – Oncologists and CAT Scans and Treatment – Oh My!

All of a sudden I am speaking fluent Cancer-ese…. I know your body on an intimate level. That first meet and greet with the Oncologist was something I will never forget….. phrases like Stage 4, Non Curative, Manage Your Symptoms – how surgery and Chemo were off the table as far as treatment went, as the outcome is no longer curative with a Stage 4 diagnosis. I know that the hormone inhibitors started out doing their job and that the tumors were responding well to treatment for that first year.

Almost two and a half years later, you’re gone and I’m trying desperately to put the pieces back together – it’s like trying to refold a fitted sheet once you’ve taken it out of the package. Your mind knows what steps you should take, but the damn thing NEVER goes back the same way, like…ever.

But where there was darkness, you found light. You thought not having Chemo was a miracle, you wouldn’t have to lose your hair. We still laugh about that you know… never mind you’d just been given a death sentence…you still had your hair! As I said, silver linings – you always found one. I remember you felt that you’d dodged a bullet, and that your job was to do “Good” as long as you were here and able to do it. So you did meals on wheels for those who needed help, you booked 2 half days a week to bring some of your elder friends out to do their errands as they couldn’t drive. You took the time to call and check in on people regularly to make sure they were doing well.

You didn’t talk about your cancer diagnosis to others outside of your immediate circle – not because you were in denial, but because when you saw people you wanted to talk about THEM, not THAT.

I really respected that about you.

It’s been said that a patients outlook is 80% of the battle – if that’s the case you were a goddamn Warrior.

Fast forward to Aug/Sept of 2015… things weren’t feeling right. That’s when we discovered that the good ol’ hormone inhibitors weren’t doing their job – your primary tumor had grown even bigger than it was when you were diagnosed, and after further scans it was noted that there were other things popping up in places they shouldn’t.

12 sessions of Radiation coming right up!

That helped, things were beginning to shrink – but within 2 months they started to increase again. Not the news we were hoping for.

May of 2016 was the beginning of the end, looking back.

A 2 week hospital stay, something going on with your abdomen.

Many appointments back and forth between your local GP, and the Cancer Centre an hour away. More scans and tests… discovered that the cancer was progressing. You never really got back on your feet after that. You seemed to improve a little and then you’d get sick again. But pain was your newest symptom…bone crushing, couldn’t get away from it, freight train kind of pain. Nausea, couldn’t even keep water down. We discovered that the nausea was a result of the pain – it hurt so much it literally made you sick. Back to the oncologist we went….

I can’t tell you how horrific watching you suffer was. I don’t honestly know how to accurately put into words the HELL that helplessness is. I do know that our JOB became advocating for you. I learned the intricacies and pitfalls of organized/combined/multiple care teams and agencies. What a shit-storm that can be! The main focus for us was for you to feel safe and secure, and be pain free.

The oncologist suggested a brain scan – that was the only thing that hadn’t been looked at. Nothing you had could cause or explain the symptoms you were having at this point. And you know what? I KNEW. Before it was even suggested to you, I knew it had spread to your brain. It was the only logical explanation. But it was also the scariest … because once it affects your brain, there’s nowhere else for it to go. We were nearing the end of alternate options. Having quickly learned that I now conversed in more medical speak than I ever thought I could possibly understand, speed reading through lab results and scan reports like a pro – I felt the heaviest ball in the pit of my stomach, the weight of a thousand worries on my shoulders.

You were taking part less and less in these appointments.

You were so DAMN tired of having to answer the same questions multiple times, with multiple care partners – seriously… do they not read the reports that we’re required to provide? How maddening is that, when your cognitive functions are playing hooky sporadically, and you’re trying your damndest to keep the details straight.

Idle chatter consisted of you oh so nonchalantly giving suggestions for songs to play at your funeral. My throat was SO raw from trying to appear unaffected and hold back the tears because a) I didn’t even want to THINK about your funeral and b) I wanted you to be able to talk to me about anything that was on your mind, and I knew if I blubbered you’d feel bad and hold back. You raised us to be able to come to you with anything, and not to ever be afraid to talk to you … I wanted to give you the same thing. What I never realized until then, was how hard it must have been for you to hear what we had to say sometimes. Thank you, from the bottom of my broken heart for doing that for us.

The last 3 months of your journey were exhausting, heartbreaking and awe inspiring all in one. You were so strong, Mom.

So.Damn.Strong.

More radiation, this time for the brain to reduce the swelling, and your new symptoms of pain and nausea attributed to the brain swelling. You being you, decided we should get your Christmas shopping done so all the kids and grandkids were taken care of. No rest for the wicked, even though you were exhausted from the treatments and symptoms. So shop we did, you sat and I pushed the wheelchair. You were like an octopus! You saw, you grabbed, you conquered!

You taught us so much about faith, resiliance, and love.

It was your wish to remain at home as long as you could – and it became our MISSION to honor that wish. Our love for you pushed us far beyond our comfort zone, and what we thought were our capabilities. We became your care team. We were the guardians at the gate, who advocated and fought for you and what you wanted. We kicked out the PSW’s and took over…. you didn’t want strangers in and out of your home. What mama wanted, mama got. When you became bedridden, we moved the recliner to your bedside and took shifts so you were never alone. You didn’t wake up scared and in pain by yourself…. we were there always. Sleep became over-rated, our backs were a mess from transferring and repositioning as required. Morning care got dubbed “Morning Torture” because although we had to reposition you to prevent bed sores, it wasn’t the most pleasant or comfortable process for you. We tracked pain med doses and celebrated those elusive moments when you were awake and lucid. Those were few and far between at this point. We talked to you, we held your hand and caressed your sweet face.

I know I grieved in degrees throughout your journey, I mourned every little loss there was. From losing your ability to find the right words, to not being able to do your beloved crossword puzzles or write a letter or note without your thoughts being scattered, or your writing being all over the place. It was so hard to watch such a scholarly woman lose the ability to do these things we all take for granted. I grieved when I heard you speaking to people who were long dead….and at that point I knew that you were already starting to transition between two places…here and there.

I remember telling you that it was okay to go. That we would be okay, and that we would all love and take care of each other the way you taught us to. I whispered in your ear, saying “Don’t be scared mama, the best is yet to come.” It was one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done, but I knew you would linger if you thought we weren’t ready, or didn’t give you permission to go. I’m glad you couldn’t see the tears streaming down my face, and I hope you felt the love that was coming from the depths of my soul. We all took turns telling you it was okay to go, that you didn’t need to suffer any longer.

3 days later and you were still hanging on… you never did take well to being told what to do! We joked that it was just typical of you, and we could almost hear you saying ” I’ll go when I’m good and ready – not a moment before.”

I remember the hours of those last days, not wanting to go to sleep because I was afraid you’d slip away while I was sleeping. I distinctly remember thinking ” I haven’t come all this way on your journey with you, to miss out on the end.”

And when it came…. I wasn’t ready.

In the two and a half years of your cancer journey, I went from being your child to your advocate, your nurse, your slayer of dragons, giver of meds, medical chauffer, live in companion, I championed your good fight with all that I had. In all the hustle and bustle of tasks, appointments, tests and treatments I fought like hell to keep you here, to keep you safe and honour your wishes.

For someone who lingered, you sure as hell didn’t waste any time when you decided it was time to go – 3 breaths and GONE! With all of us surrounding you, with our hands still holding you, I watched you take your last breath. I saw your spirit leave your body with that last exhale … you were gone. It was SO fast.

In the space between your last inhale/exhale it hit me like a freight train. It was like when you gave me that push on my little purple bike all those years ago, letting me know I could ride like a big girl … only this time exhilaration was replaced with terror.

Stark fucking TERROR.

The loss was immediate.

All of a sudden there I stood, feeling like a little girl afraid to face the world without her mama. I had tricked myself into thinking I was ready, but at the end we all realize we’re never really ready to let go. I’m a wife and mother myself…but in that moment I was your baby, and I just wanted a little more time. Just to look into your beautiful eyes and hear you say I love you once more. To thank you one last time for EVERYTHING. To repeat every single thing I had told you over those last weeks because in the end, you always feel like you’ve forgotten something. There was one thing I hadn’t yet said, so I leaned down close and whispered in your ear “Rest easy, Mama…tell Dad we love him.”

We prayed over you, some of us *cough* were a little rusty as we didn’t all have the same strong beliefs that you did. But we remembered the words of our childhood, and prayed you out, as one last show of solidarity, love and respect.

I didn’t realize just how difficult or stressful funeral arrangements could be – OMG, who would have EVER thought that deciding on flower arrangements could be so agonizing?! Trying to remember all the likes and dislikes….stressing over the right shade, and knowing you’d haunt us til our dying day if there were any red flowers in your arrangements. And your outfit, that was a tough one too. You got your song selections for your funeral, it was a beautiful ceremony and celebration of you. When it was over, the amount of free time was a challenge. I honestly didn’t know what to do with myself. The days felt twice as long and the loss was soul deep.

Seeing you off on the final leg of your journey is the greatest privilege I have ever known, I am so very grateful that we were able to do this for you, and for ourselves. All the love you gave in life came full circle in the end, mama. I hope we made you as proud as you’ve made us. xo

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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