If you’re an adult, this should pretty much go without saying, but cheating is really one of the worst things you can do to someone with whom you’re in a relationship. And the worst thing about that worst thing is just how many people somehow don’t see cheating as a problem, or don’t see what they’re doing (cheating) as actually cheating.
Some people will say, “We only kissed, that’s not cheating!” as if everything is completely fine as long there’s no actual sex, which is a ridiculous assumption. Ugh, the whole thing is a mess of betrayal and lies leading to drama and pain. It’s almost enough to make you want to throw the towel in on dating altogether. But just almost. Come on. We’re human. We’re gonna keep going back for more.
There are so many factors that lead people to cheat—their upbringing (as in, the situation with their parents), their self-esteem, and how they ultimately feel about relationships, to name just a few. Also, some people are just kind of more selfish than others. And sneaky! But it truly is always the fault of the cheater and not the cheatee. The cheatee is in no way responsible for the behavior of the cheater, and the cheater blaming them for their own mistakes when they cheat is just adding insult to injury.
Here are 21 actual reasons people have given for why they cheated, as told by their exes.
1.
She said “My mom cheated on my dad when they first started dating.”
2.
“It’s not really cheating because I don’t love you anymore. I just think of you as a really good friend.”
8 years together, engaged to be married.
3.
“We’re in an open relationship!”
Except we weren’t. The day before she asked if I would be open to one and I said let me think about it and we can talk tomorrow. The next day comes around and she said she has to go to a study session with one of her friends when i get home. I found out she was at a dick session when she was telling her best friend immediately after.
4.
“I dont understand American culture.” Was a pretty good one.
5.
When confronted she just said “Well his dick was 30 cm, I just couldn’t resist touching it.” I really couldn’t think of an answer back then.
6.
“I’ve cheated with everyone I’ve ever been in a relationship with.”
Why would you not tell me that before we got into a relationship??
7.
“I wore a condom…technically, I didn’t even touch her!”
8.
“I was testing you to see if you’d stay loyal even if I cheated.”
9.
“It’s your fault, you drove me to it.”
Me: Taking care of our two kids <3y, working full time, bread winner, doing the household chores… so yeah, I was kind of angry/tired all the time
Him: working in ‘music’, going to concerts all the time and sleeping in.
10.
She said she wasn’t cheating, I got sent to me a picture of her (nudes) from the guy she was cheating on me with and he said, “look familiar”. When I confronted her about it she said those were old pictures and he was just trying to start shit. I was like hmm fair enough, then I realized that the pictures were literally taken in her dorm room that she had just moved into that year and I was standing in the same spot that she took them in as I was talking to her which made me realize, took me a second to realize that but yeah that sucked. Rough time for me on that one
