Jugs. Knockers. Cantaloupes. It’s safe to say that our culture… appreciates a voluptuous female form. Lovely ladies come in all shapes and sizes, and they all have their own perks and struggles. Us girls with a few extra curves up top are a special group with special struggles only we understand. Here are a few:
- Camisoles with built-in bras. Ha. No. Nice try, though.
- Soooo… As, Bs and Cs, get all the lacey and polka dot bra options, but Ds, DDs, and beyond are stuck with plain white or beige? Cool.
- Growing up everyone assumed you were older. I’m twelve please stop looking at me like that.
- Unless you’re wearing a turtleneck, there’s probably cleavage happening.
- Like, shirts that look casual on your A-cup friends just look like “HERE ARE MY BOOBS” on you.
- But rocking just the exact right amount of cleavage is a magical thing.
- Forget about button down shirts. You always think that this one fits, until surprise gap. Gaps everywhere. Gaps for days.
- Or you just pop a button in public.
- When you don’t feel like brushing your hair or wrestling with eyeliner… so you just grab your favorite plunging neckline and trust that no one will be looking at your face.
- Working out means two sports bras at least.
- Cross body bags and seat belts are always trying to destroy you.
- When you try to lie on your stomach. Oof.
- When you lie on your stomach on the beach and you can carve out two convenient boob holes in the sand. Life is beautiful.
- One size fits all? Lies. ALL LIES.
- You’re a pro at the subtle adjust-your-boobs-in-public maneuver.
- The Oscars red carpet makes you sad because you could never wear anything that backless. Or with that much sideboob. At least, not without popping out all over the place. At least your girl Christina Hendricks is out there repping busty ladies everywhere.
- High tables or bars = convenient boob shelf.
- You dread unexpected running. Ow ow ow ow ow ow.
- Ditto walking down stairs.
- When you find that dress that makes you look vavoom in the best way.
- All your strapless bras just really want to be belts.
- Which means that strapless dresses are a dangerous game.
- So is moving too quickly in a bikini.
- Removing your bra only to be showered with crumbs and the occasional pen cap. Why are there potato chips in here… I didn’t even eat potato chips??
- Why do boys assume an amble bosom means you’re just down to clown all the time?
- On the other hand, being buxom does make you feel extra sexy when you are down for it.
- Praying that the zipper won’t stop right at your bra-line. It fits the bottom half of me, at least.
- When your bra is a little too snug, and it gives you that double-boob look. Not cute. Curse you, bra manufacturers, and your inconsistent sizing.
- Casually holding your boobs when you’re just chilling at home, because it’s weirdly comfortable. Ok, I get why people are so into them.
- Most clothes make you look like a sexpot or a nun in a poncho.
- Loving your luscious, well-endowed self, even when it’s a struggle.
