He Might Have Wounded Your Soul, But He Didn’t Dim The Light In Your Heart

He might have broken your heart but just because he failed to see your worth and didn’t appreciate your loving heart, doesn’t mean he gets to take away the best parts of you. He might have wounded your soul but he did not break you.

There’s so much more to you than what he took from you. He was just a chapter in your life you will recover from. You’ll be able to move on and start anew because the flame in your heart always flickers and gives you the strength you need to heal your wounded soul.

“Tell your heart to beat again. Close your eyes and breathe it in, let your shadows fall away, step into the light of grace. Yesterday’s a closing door, you don’t live there anymore. Say goodbye to where you’ve been and tell your heart to beat again”  

Don’t dwell on the damage that he’s caused. Don’t give them your time or thoughts, he’s not worth your tears, he’s not worthy of you, especially of your loving nature. He no longer has power over your heart and you should find relief in knowing that you’re free to be yourself again. You can say goodbye to the bitter, haggard person his toxic love turned you into.

You can now focus on healing your heart and on patiently waiting for the love that you truly deserve. Don’t regret giving your heart away to the wrong person. Never apologize for having the ability to love passionately and intensely.

Giving your heart to him doesn’t just come with negative consequences. Whether you see it or not, you’re learning from this, you’ll become stronger because of this.

Live your life with zero regrets because that’s the only way to live. Don’t blame yourself for what went wrong. It’s not your fault.  He missed out on loving you and his lack of commitment is not a reflection of you.

Right now you’re just bending but you won’t break. Allow yourself to feel the weight of your heavy heart but trust that the light in your heart will guide you and you’ll find your way out of this temporary darkness.

“A broken heart heals when we allow the healing to go as deep as the wound went” 

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28 Signs Your Life Is A Romantic Comedy, Minus The Romance

Everything is almost right. You’re meeting cute guys in even cuter ways. Your friends are hilarious: every time you say “lol,” you are actually laughing out loud. And you’re clumsier than ever. In an adorable way, of course.

 

The problem? The cute guys never text you back. And when your hilarious friends actually give you good advice, you don’t follow it. Everything about your life is exactly like a romantic comedy, minus the romance. Because when it comes to love, your gut is at the bottom of the gutter.

 

1. You met a hot, adorable guy in an elevator the other day.

 

2. He helped you pick up your purse and didn’t even laugh at all the tampons and Tums he saw.

 

3. But he never texted you back.

 

4. Your first kiss with the last guy you were dating was in the rain.

 

5. . . . It’s too bad you were wearing a white shirt and your worst bra.

 

6. You live in a really expensive apartment. You can barely afford it, and it’s not fancy at all. It’s actually a totally run-down disaster.

 

7. And it’s always messy.

 

8. Your best friend is more quirky than you.

 

9. But her advice on love and romance? Terrible.

 

10. You’re extremely awkward, especially around attractive men. But not in a way that’s also kind of cute.

 

11. You hate this one guy so much right now.

 

12.  . . . He’s going to be your next boyfriend.

 

13. Your gay co-worker tells you what to wear.

 

14. And how to give a blow job.

 

15. But it seems that whenever you follow his advice, disaster strikes.

 

16. Like, when he told you to hum while you give a blow job, you hummed “Let It Go” from Frozen.

 

 

To The Girl With A Brave Face And Broken Heart

“Be That strong girl that everyone knew would make it through the worst, be that fearless girl, the one who would dare do anything, be that independent girl who didn’t need a man. Be the girl who never backed down.” -Taylor Swift 

The thing I find most interesting about broken hearts is anyone at any moment can be crumbling before you. You’d never know because they go through the motions, they have to and put on a brave face. You’d never know they cried themselves to sleep that night, or woke up with a knot in their stomach, not wanting to move. You wouldn’t know how often they look at the pictures and look back at the past, to a time when things were simple.

You don’t know these things, because sometimes it’s easier to pretend everything is okay than actually admit someone blew your heart to shreds and left you to pick up the pieces.

“The hard part is pretending not to give a f$ck when you really do. The worst part is trying to close your heart when it’s doors have been blown to pieces,” R.M Drake  

To the girl who has mastered the brave face,

Why Girls Who Go Through A Brutal Breakup End Up The Happiest

“Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you’ll start having positive results.” –Willie Nelson

You’re going through a brutal breakup and the last thing you wanna hear right now is things happen for a reason.Like, come on!. You’re emotionally exhausted, your heart is aching and so over feeling like you’ve been deprived of happiness forever.

You should trust that in a weird way, whether you think it’s possible or not right now, you’ll end up the happiest. Your heart will go through hell and back and will most definitely survive it.

Right now, you just can’t find any sense of solace in a few words of encouragement.

Because you simply cannot comprehend how life can be so unfair. You loved passionately and intensely and in the blink of an eye, it all went to shit. You can’t accept it and absolutely nothing can ease the pain that you’re feeling right this second.

The memories that you built with him are all you can think about and the thought of him kissing you again literally consumes every second of your day. He’s all you ever wanted and you can’t fathom life without him. You wonder, how am I ever going to get him off my mind? How is my body ever going feel like he made me feel?

It’s a pressure in your chest that makes it almost impossible to hold back your tears. It’s brutal.

Stupid Me, I Actually Thought You Were ‘The One’

I know that we all have certain ideas in our head about what it means to fall in love. We the kind of the love that we pictured since we were kids, that we thought about and then over thought about. But the thing is when we meet the right person, or at least the one we think is the right one, we don’t really have a choice.

We’re in it no matter what our head tells us, no matter how unrealistic or silly it might seem to everyone else. We are just so sure.  And that’s who you were to me.

You knew just what to say to make me believe you.

You knew just what I wanted to hear, all the things that I was scared of you, you made me forget all of that. Because of you, I finally opened up. I finally let all my walls come falling down. It wasn’t for myself. It was for you. Because I thought, just this once, that I got it right. That I wasn’t making it all up.

You had my heart, and for a really long time, I thought that it was safe with you.

It didn’t end all at once. It was a slow letdown. I kept holding on. For whatever reason made the most sense at the time. I was sure that if I just stuck it out, you could see that I was the one for you. That my heart and your heart were the same.

 

And When She’s Had Enough, This Is What You’ll Miss

She was the girl who saw past your flaws. She’s the one who saw the light in you and supported you, spoiled you and unconditionally loved you. She was not afraid to let you into her heart but she never imagined that the risk of getting a broken heart would be way too high.

She held onto you for as long as she could, but she realized that she was giving way more than she was receiving.

She’s had enough and staying would have been a betrayal to her soul, so you gave her no choice but to walk away.

She waited for you to give her a reason to stay, to give her a smidgen of hope that you would change, but no, you had no intention to fight for her

You got too comfortable being loved by her without realizing that her needs were as important as yours.

You didn’t fight for her and the truth is, you’re going to regret it. You’re going to miss her like crazy. You’ll realize that letting her go was the dumbest thing you’ve ever done in your life.

You’re going to realize that she’s probably the only person in this world besides yourself that actually gets you.

You’re going to find yourself understanding how she had the ability to motivate you like no other and that it was with her that you were able to be the best version of yourself.

Because she was a selfless girl with a big heart who gave you more than you deserved. You took advantage of her until you sucked the life out of her. Shame on you.

You can be sure that when you least expect it, the memory of her is going to creep in and you will long for her loving touch and the way she looked at you.

Because she looked at you and made you feel relevant, it made you feel like you had potential. She made you feel loved and you never felt love like hers before. You’re going to miss all of her so much is going to drive you off the wall.

She will no longer be there for you and you’ll realize how much you actually need her in your life.

You’ll wish you would have appreciated her sooner, you’ll wish you hugged her and kissed her every time she spent the night sleeping next to you.

You’re going to miss how she always went out of the way to cater to your needs and make you happy. You were so used to her making you the center of her world, you didn’t realize how she was the only one around you making you a priority.

No one cares for you as much as she did and you know it. You’re going to feel it the most when you have no one to turn to when you need cheering or a simple pad in the back.

Her absence will be so painful it will punish you for every single time you did her wrong. You’ll ask yourself a million times why you couldn’t see how much she meant to you. There’s no going back, you lost your chance, she was the one for you and you let her slip away.

You’ll experience heartache for the first time and you will be the only one to blame for it.

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Why You’ll Regret Leaving The Girl Who Loved You With All Of Her Heart

“When I was a kid, most of the advice that my dad gave me was crap. But there’s one thing that he said that was pure genius …he said if you’re ever with a girl that’s too good for you, marry her.” – Valentine’s Day

She was willing to give you all of herself…

Some girls have this ability to love deeply. They love no matter what has happened in their past. They trust their heart and follow it fearlessly.

Somewhere the way, it led her to you. She was the girl willing to do just about anything for you… even when you didn’t ask.

She never held back telling you what she was thinking and feeling. Through actions, time and time again she showed it.

But you broke her.

You couldn’t reciprocate the kind of love she was offering. Maybe you weren’t mature enough. Maybe you were too selfish.

Maybe the timing was off between you two. Finding “the one” at a young age has a way of fucking up even the most normal guy.

But you broke her heart. And even after you did that, she was still kind and still loved you.

She was willing to love you deeply…

She probably could have loved you the rest of her life. And forever between you two, probably crossed her mind. She probably told you about it fearlessly, because love wasn’t something she ever held back.

She might have lived in a world all her own, with these ideas of how love is supposed to be, but she believed love more than anyone you ever met.

You never had to question how she felt about you, but she was always left wondering were her feelings reciprocated.

But you didn’t realize how rare her love was.

You were too young to realize how rare she was. It wasn’t until you met other girls who left you with a void, you began to put it together… you messed up. Even at their best, others who loved you, couldn’t compare to the depth that she did.

She believed in you…

When it seemed no one else believed in you, it was like she had this ability to see into your soul.

She understood you more than you understood yourself sometimes. More than that, she believed in the person you were and believed in the potential of what you could be, even when you didn’t see it yet.

She never questioned whether you guys could make it.

But you believed you could find better.

Maybe, she had a flaw you couldn’t shake. Maybe, you were lying to yourself it couldn’t work. Despite whatever insecurities you had about you two, she never did.

It’s only natural to want to explore other options. You wanted to see what was out there.

When you did…all you could do was look back, at what you left behind.

She thought you were perfect…

Despite the many flaws that you even spelled out to her, she still looked at you like you were her world. Because you were and to hear you were completely perfect.

But it wasn’t until you left, you realized she was.

In time you realized your greatest flaw was in your lack of judgment. You were blind to what was right in front of you. Just as she wouldn’t have changed a thing about you, changing anything about her would make her imperfect.

You realized her only flaw would be settling for you in the first place. You knew she deserved better.

She learned to love again.

Despite being let down by you, you had to watch her love again. You knew the type of woman she was.

You knew how gentle, loving and caring she would be, towards this new person. You knew she’d treat him just as she treated you, only he wouldn’t make the same mistake.

And only then you realized what you lost.

In that realization, you knew you made the biggest mistake of your life.

So if you ever want to live the rest of your life with regret, let go of the one person who loves you more.

When you do that, what if’ will haunt you until the day you die.

6 Types Of Relationships You Should Definitely Say Bye To In 2019

The energy it takes to hang on to the relationships that aren’t building you up are holding you back from living your life fully.

2019 is the year we all have to fall back in love with ourselves. A big part of that process is to say #bye to all the people that aren’t making us fully happy. Because there is a more extraordinary love out there that you would never know if it didn’t end it with the last one. But the extraordinary has to start with you end things with the person who clearly doesn’t deserve you and watch how quickly new light comes into your life.  

1. Almost Relationships.

Fuck that. No really, fuuckkk that. You give too much to receive an “almost.” You offer too much to waste your time with someone who gives you almost what you need – someone who is not yet ready for love, who is afraid to say too much, to feel too deeply, to let people know what they mean to them. Whatever their reason is for not being ready, you have to walk away. Because you can never ever convince or inspire anyone to do the work to be ready. And plus, you’re just too fly for that shit.

2. Constant excuses.

I get it, they’re complicated. They’ve been through a lot. They’re broken, their past, pride, demons, the fact that they’re weak or scared, is their validation for why they stopped fighting for you, making an effort for you, the list can go on and on. But at the end of the day, we all have issues. We all have situations that have broken us, that have given us every right and reason to make excuses for why we act shitty. But all that matters, in the end, is that we have a choice about how we’re going to treat people. Being enigmatic is never an excuse to treat people poorly.

If you find yourself constantly upset and frustrated it might be time to say bye, because eloquent excuses for why they’re acting like shit will only make you feel better temporarily, but at the end, you will be the one who will suffer the most.

3. Not being appreciated.

It’s not the thought that counts. It’s not enough how they look at you, what they think about you. People think it’s enough that deep down, they love you. But that’s never enough – the only way we can judge people’s true feelings and characters is through their actions.

Don’t forget, just because someone is with you, has ‘committed’ to you, doesn’t mean they have chosen you. They have to make an effort for you, appreciate you, fight for you. If someone is willing to discard your love for the next hit, willing to lose love because of their pride, fears, ego or selfish ways, show them the door.

Because someone will value how special you are – someone will put in the effort it takes to be with you. If the person you’re with doesn’t wake up and realize you’re worth fighting for, they are the one who will suffer the most, but you are still the one with the full power to say #bye.

4. One foot out the door.

Many people haven’t lived enough to realize how special a true connection is. So they have one foot out the door. They don’t realize that this ‘something better’ is all an illusion – just their ego talking.

Many don’t realize an extraordinary love or person when they see it, because they themselves have to do the work to be extraordinary. If someone is unable to see what is right in front of them, if they think easiness is good, that there’s something better, that the more chances they have, the better, let them go.

5. Inconsistency.  

You know what I’m talking about, the ‘hey babe ‘I’m going to be super sweet toward you one night and then act like I don’t care the next.’ The ‘everything is going great but suddenly I’m going to pull back because I’m scared and complicated and this is too much.’ The ‘I don’t want to put in the effort that it will take to be with you, but I still like you and want to hook up with you so I’ll just half-ass it and do the bare minimum.’ No.

Not only is this a huge waste of your time, but it’s also super unattractive. Don’t let the mixed signals fool you. Indecision is a decision.

6. Selfish relationships.

My favorite. We all thought we wanted the complicated, mysterious “bad boy/girl.” This is also the person who pulls a 180 when everything is going great and tells you they’re in a very difficult time in their life, “I just can’t…I need space, I like you so much but this is very overwhelming for me…I like you too much, I’m scared.”

In reality, this person is just a narcissist, and after you constantly have to bend over backward and put your feelings aside because, you know, their inner world is just so deep and complicated, you’ll realize that the rush of the drama will get old fast when stress and instability starts to swallow your happiness.

Honestly, you’re too baller for any of that, and if you find yourself always being wrong, tiptoeing around them, listening to them for hours about how delicate and perplexing their emotions are, run away. They’re not that complicated – they’re just selfish as fuck.

When things aren’t meant to be, you will find yourself wasting so much of your energy trying to change them, fight for them, understand what went wrong. But sometimes, the best thing to do is just to let go, and watch how many greater things come into your life.

Things To Remind Yourself After Losing The Love Of Your Life

The pain of losing the love of your life is more than just emotional: it takes over your mind, your body, your muscles. It consumes you; it eats you. It shatters you to your core, and it breaks your bones and your heart like you never knew was actually humanly possible.

You can’t sleep, you can’t eat, you can’t function – even blinking is too much work. This insurmountable, unrecoverable torture that you have been forced to live through has left you limp on the ground, completely relinquishing all power or will to stay alive.

You want to run or sleep for the rest of time, or simply just stop breathing, but doing any of these will cause you to miss an entire day of grieving – an entire day of growth. Because as crazy as it sounds: every single day that you fight is a day that you become stronger.

1. Don’t ask yourself why.

The question why is toxic, and it will leave you feeling unfulfilled. Instead, focus on the positive: be thankful for things. How could you be thankful for this stabbing, aching, the fire inside your heart? Find something. Anything.

Be thankful for the time you were given together, be thankful for your health, or for flowers, or the color purple, or fried chicken. Eventually, you will be thankful for this tragedy, as it will become a piece of you – a piece of your long journey.

2. Don’t put yourself in a box.

Allow your process to just be: follow it, flow with it, trust it. Your heartbreak is your own, no one else’s, and you are the only person experiencing it. There are no time restrictions, rules, or schedules that you should be following.

There will come a day – and it will be sooner than you think it’s coming – where the majority of the day was good, and the minority was bad. And even if that ratio is just a 51:49 at first, know that there will be more and more days where your heart begins to mend its pieces back together.

3. And soon, the good memories will flood the painful ones.

Instead of feeling the longing, desperate-to-have-back kind of loss that you felt at first, you will find yourself thinking of your memory in a beautiful light.

I’m not quite sure, myself if the pain ever gets any easier – it just becomes different. It’s not like the hole in your heart will one day be filled again, but you will begin to live again. You’ll learn how to live and how to love again with your new heart – with the new shape, and weight of it.

4. As a fighter, your battle wounds will make you, you.

I know that my wounds have done that for me. And as horrible as it is: you and I, we are the same. We are survivors. And we hold an unfortunate beauty that not everyone has; one that we didn’t ask for but will learn to wear with strength.

We’ll find meaning in meaningless things, and beauty in nothingness. We’ll see people; we’ll feel them in ways that we never did before. Somewhere between what we survived, and what we are becoming, we will learn to live again.

And know this: our loved ones are free now. And we, too, will figure out how to be.

The Truth Is, You’re Never Too Damaged For Love

Think you are damaged goods? Not so fast!

“I know you think you’re scary and damaged. It makes you think you don’t deserve good things, but you do. And Derek, he’s bad for you. But me, I’m a good thing. And if this is a race, if there is a ring, my hat is in.” – Grey’s Anatomy 

When it comes to love, it’s easy to get caught up in a whirlwind of insecurities. When life breaks us over and over, we internalize the idea that we’re to blame and assume we don’t deserve good things.

If you find yourself stuck in self-loathing, remember this.

 

You deserve more than what you’re settling for…

Sometimes our insecurities cause us to settle. Maybe you’ve made mistakes in your past. Maybe you look at your reflection and see everything that’s under the surface, every person you’ve hurt.

But I’m here to tell you, you aren’t that person anymore. You need to stop defining yourself by the past.

 

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