What Is Confidence Anyway ?

“Now, see… the thing that makes women strong is that we have the guts to be vulnerable. We have the ability to feel the depths of our emotion, and we know that we will walk through it to the other side.” -Cat Grant on SuperGirl CW

We Are All Unique

There is no woman exactly like another, but there is one thing that we all have in common with one another, the strength to be vulnerable. We love with every part of our hearts. When our hearts shatters we feel as though we will never make it through. The amazing strength of all of us is that we love with everything and know that we will make it through the heart break.

“We know that we will walk through it to the other side.” This is confidence and after a major break up you don’t have that. You spend time wondering what went wrong but it’s time to make a change in your life. It is time to put your confidence and your life back. Most people make the mistake of thinking that they need superficial badges of success before they can feel good about themselves, things like money, fame, a big house, the right job or the right car. This is not a way to build your confidence because what happens when all these things are stripped away? You feel insecure and worthless again.

Our confidence is determined by closing the gap between where we are now and where we want to be.

The beauty of this is that you can be miles away from where you want to be and still be confident. Picture yourself living the life you want, with the person you want to spend it with, doing the things that make you happiest. And picture yourself not crying over a guy who is not crying about you. Picture yourself out with friends having a great time and happy.

We all deal with confidence issues.

Every girl, every guy, ever person has dealt with a confidence issue or will deal with another confidence issue. It could be you don’t know where the problems lies in your lack of confidence or it could be you are lacking the tools to fix it.

Once all your merits and possessions have been stripped away, how much can you genuinely love yourself? It’d the extent to which you can look in the mirror and say: “That person right there in front of me is the best friend I will ever have.” When you can do this nothing else matters at the end of the day, because this is the layer of confidence that no one can takeaway from you.

Here are ten ways to up your confidence when you are feeling down and out.

1. Look at your best self.

Don’t save it for special occasions. If it makes you feel good about yourself, then add it to your morning ritual. Anything you do from washing, shaving,brushing/flossing your teeth, putting on moisturizer, dressing your best, make-up,sorting out your hair.Take some pride in your appearance and take the time to look your best. This might mean you have to get up 45 minutes earlier, well so be it! It will make a huge difference when you start the day.

2. Work on your body.

Start exercising 3-4 times a week. I know it’s a pain and we don’t always have time for it but you will feel better, look better, and sleep better. Don’t spend hours in the gym. It takes 30-45 mins for a proper gym session so work less and enjoy more. Get creative! You don’t always have to go to the gym. Be outside and do new things.

Pages: 123

You might think she’s guarded. You might think she’s not worth it if she’s putting you through all of this. But you’re wrong. I’m sure she’s had her heartbroken and I’m sure she’s broken a few hearts of her own. It doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt either way.

When dealing with the ‘picky’ girl, there are just a few things you should know before getting involved:

1. She won’t waste your time

If you’re interested, go for it. However, the thing about the ‘picky’ girl is, she won’t string you along. She won’t lead you on. If she’s not interested in you, she is going to do you a favor and not play with your feelings.

2. She’s independent and always will be. Don’t expect it to change.

She’s always been independent but there’s nothing wrong with that. I’m sure it’ll take some getting used to but don’t think she isn’t going to be there for you. She will need her space and she will want you to have some time to yourself too. Whether that is hanging with your friends or family.

When she wants you around, know it’s for a reason and a good one at that. Don’t take advantage of it.

3. She won’t settle.

She is looking for her ‘Prince Charming’ or at least someone that makes her feel equivalent to how she thinks he would make her feel. Why? You ask. Well because boys (notice how I use that term appropriately) before you just didn’t live up to the standards. Those standards, well, she will stop at nothing to achieve them. So if you don’t measure up, I’m sure you’ll know.

4. Since she won’t settle, she is a hopeless romantic.

She might seem like she is easy-going, laid back, and low-maintenance but since she chose you…she’s going to expect a lot from you. Sweet stuff, surprises, romantic dates, etc. You know, like all those corny things guys do in the movies for girls they love? That is the expectation. It might seem silly to you but this is what her standards are. She wants you to fight for her.

5. She doesn’t believe that chivalrous guys still exist. So prove her wrong.

Do her this favor. Prove yourself. Prove that you’re different than any other guy she ‘talked’ to, dated, hung out with, is friends with, etc. This is why she is picky. She believes that none of you chivalrous guys are still around so, “Why bother?”

6. She’s confident.

You might think that being independent and being confident are pretty similar. You’re wrong. She knows what kind of girl she is and wants to be. She doesn’t need anyone else to tell her that. So, it is your job to show her that she does need you. Not specifically to make her confident, but in other ways.

So, let her be confident. It is the sexiest thing a girl can wear.

7. She is goal-oriented. So she’ll expect you to be, too.

There is a bar or ceiling that most people see. However, she goes above and beyond it. She’ll expect that from you. If you’re not goal-oriented or driven, then don’t bother. She can date herself instead if she’s going to have to drag you along with her.

8. She only believes in relationships that will better herself.

If the relationship she is in no longer serves her or grows her, she’s gone. There is no convincing her because as far as she is concerned, you’re most likely not going to be in her life.

And sooner or later, she will thank you for that.

Tag: find-confidence-in-yourself

Confidence is knowing we will walk through pain to the other side