love-language Archives

The Benefits of Learning All About Love Languages

The theory of the five love languages has been around for a while now, and people will often use it in their own unique ways in order to better understand themselves and those around them. Though many people think of love languages in a completely individualized romantic sense, there are so many benefits that can come along with learning about the love languages and how they function in life. Learning about how to better communicate with those around you can always bring a new level of understanding to your life, no matter who you are and what your social situation is. Here are just a few of the benefits that can come along with learning all about the love languages.

Knowing Yourself Better

One of the first things that can happen after you take the love languages quiz is that you begin to understand yourself and your own personality a little bit better. Although this can be a pitfall, as many people start and stop with the love languages at their own personal discovery, it is an extremely good place to start so that you can understand what you need and how you tend to give affection to those in your life.

Being More Sensitive to Those Around You

One of the next steps that comes along with applying your knowledge of the love languages into your life is being more sensitive to the needs of those around you. When you learn to speak somebody else’s love language, it comes along with understanding the ways that they prefer to receive love and how they can best understand your affection for them. This requires an additional level of thought, because you have to consider their thought process rather than just going with your own.

Strengthening Your Romantic Relationships

One of the primary benefits of learning about love languages can be the improvement of your romantic relationships and the strengthening of your romantic bonds. When you learn how to express your love in a way that’s compatible with your partner’s communication style, it can make you feel closer and more in sync. Specifically, if the both of you engage in this positive communication pattern, it can make the relationship feel natural and bring a sense of ease that you might have been missing before.

Strengthening Your Personal Relationships

Even beyond your romantic partnerships, learning love languages can help to strengthen your personal relationships in your family and social life. It can sometimes be easy to forget that romantic partnerships are not the only places where we show love and affection to the people that we care about. From your family to the friends that you cherish, knowing and consistently thinking about the love languages of the people around you can help you better communicate how much you value them, in addition to making sure that they feel seen and understood.

Being More Observant

Not everybody in the world is going to tell you their love language or have that conversation with you, especially if you are a new presence in their life. However, by learning about the love languages, you can become a more observant and attentive person, and figure out the patterns of someone else’s love language in order to act in accordance with it before you know for sure. This can be a great way to make somebody feel comfortable, to communicate your care for them and to build a foundation of trust and understanding.

Better Communicating Your Needs

Taking things back to utilizing love languages to communicate your own needs, this is an important part of learning about the love languages. By knowing exactly how are you prefer to receive love, you can make it much easier for those around you to provide the emotional support that you’re looking for, which can actively break down barriers that would hinder communication in other situations. In order to be a better communicator, part of the deal is knowing yourself and your own needs.

Feeling More In Touch With Yourself

Aside from everyone else and your communication with others in your life, there is a sense of power that comes along with knowing yourself and understanding the things that you need in order to feel safe and loved. By understanding some of those key elements of your personality, you can also provide yourself with the care and support that you need in your daily life. This can help you feel much more in touch with yourself and your desires.

Knowing Your Love Languages

There’s so much value in knowing the ways that love languages can work in your life and in the lives of those around you. Regardless of what your love languages actually are, you can utilize your knowledge to build better relationships with your partners, your friends, your family and even yourself. Have you experienced any of these fantastic benefits of learning about the love languages? Or are you ready to get started?

About The Author

Ava Roman (she/her) is the Managing Editor of Revivalist, a women’s lifestyle magazine that empowers women to live their most authentic life. When Ava is not writing you’ll find herin a yoga class, advocating for body positivity, whipping up something delicious in the kitchen, or smashing the patriarchy.

The 5 love languages

My boyfriend decided he would buy me earrings for Christmas. The problem is that I don’t have my ears pierced. Also I don’t wear or really care for jewlery. Now, one would think that if he payed attention to what I do like then I would be happy. It just so happens that he didn’t know my love language. I can’t be upset because I didn’t know his love language either. For Christmas, I bought him a personalized wallet with his initials that was made out of deer and leather. It also had a shotgun shell on it. He’s not into sentimental gifts or just gifts in general. What was his love language?

5 love languages

Number 1. Gift giving. Receiving gifts make you happier than anything.

Number 2. Acts of service. It makes you most happy when someone does chores, favors, errands or just something for you that you don’t have to.

Number 3. Words of affirmation. You love getting compliments, or some sort of verbal praise more than anything.

Number 4. Physical touch. Your favorite thing is to be kissed, hugged, cuddle, sex, hold hands, or any other form of physical contact.

Number 5. Quality time. All you want to do is just simply spend time with one another. And that’s all you need.

It just so happens that my boyfriend’s love language is acts of service. He likes it when I do the dishes or laundry because he hates that stuff. It makes him happy when he has someone else so fill that need. My love language is quality time. I just want to spend as much time with him as I can. I don’t like feeling alone and it makes me happy when we can bond.

One might call me needy, but I need all 5 love languages. It’s nice to have a gift here or there, a kiss to remind me that I’m loved, the yard mowed because I don’t like doing it, a date night or a compliment. Quality of time may be my top one, but that doesn’t mean I don’t desire others. I believe that everyone needs these acts of love. It’s not just about take, but giving too. Figure out what love language you and your partner have. Try it. It just might save your relationship!

What’s Your Love Language, and Why Does it Matter?

You may or may not have heard of the “5 love languages.??? This is a book by Gary Chapman that has been really popular among couples and, of course, therapists.

It sounds incredibly cheesy, but it’s actually an essential read.

It’s important to understand how different people communicate differently. You may express your feelings one way while your partner expresses his or hers another way.

You might feel underappreciated and unloved if your partner is communicating these feelings in a language you don’t understand.

And they might feel frustrated in return if they feel like they’re doing all the right things and you just aren’t getting it.

Understanding these differences can help strengthen your relationship. If you recognize what your partner needs from you and vice versa, it’s so much easier to meet those needs.

We tend to think our partners should just know what we expect. But it’s totally unrealistic. No one is a mind reader!

So what’s your love language?

1. Words of Affirmation

Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your preferred language, then you need to have things vocalized to you.

You feel love through compliments and admissions of love. Hearing the words ‘i love you’ is going to mean more to you than a simple gesture.

You need to hear the reasons behind this love. You tend to really only understand how your partner feels if he or she can express these feelings to you out loud.

And because you’re so focused on specific words, negative words or insults tend to seriously harm you and leave you feeling broken and unloved.

2. Acts of Service

If this is your language, then you tend to understand love through nice gestures and actions. Maybe you don’t feel like cleaning the house and your partner offers to do it for you.

The little things your partner does to help you out will mean the most to you. You’ll feel their love through these little acts.

You’ll appreciate the sentiments behind these gestures more than any words he or she might say.

On a similar note, laziness and broken promises tend to make you feel unimportant and neglected.

3. Receiving Gifts

This might be your love language if you appreciate surprise gifts the most. You feel the most loved when your partner shows up with a rose or sends you a little love note out of the blue.

People of this language are often misinterpreted as being materialistic, but it isn’t about the physical gifts.

If this is how you perceive love, then you value the thoughtfulness and effort behind the gift.

Knowing that someone took the time to find the perfect gift for you means the whole world.

On the other hand, if your partner forgets a birthday or anniversary or any other events, it will crush you.

4. Quality Time

Having your partner’s complete, undivided attention is the most valuable thing you can have. You equate quality alone time together as true love.

You genuinely appreciate when your partner turns off his or her phone and is completely there just for you.

You love having his or her full attention and actually being listened to.

However, you tend to feel devastated if he or she becomes distracted or cancels a date.

5. Physical Touch

This isn’t just about sex. You feel the most loved when your partner does things like hug you or hold your hand.

You feel the safest and the most cherished when you’re physically close to someone.

You appreciate and understand things like a kiss on the forehead or a simple back rub.

If your partner lacks this physical presence, you are likely to feel insecure and neglected.

So, take some time to understand your love language as well as your partner’s. It may just save your relationship!

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