10 Reasons I am Hopeful for 2022

I had my ups and downs with 2021 – probably like with many other people. I think the COVID fatigue has been hitting me. I thought the pandemic would be over months ago, but here we are. The biggest moments of darkness for me came in other problems besides the pandemic such as depression, job anxiety, low self-esteem, doubts about my future, drama with loved ones (which is normal for family), not seeing loved ones due to the pandemic, not seeing friends, either, because of the pandemic, feeling low, not having enough money, feeling useless – the list can go on for me. I think I have found 10 hopeful reasons, though, for why 2022 will give me some hope in my own personal life.

1. My boyfriend

He has saved me at my lowest points and has made me feel like I am capable of doing anything. He was truly a blessing in disguise and I have hope he will help make 2022 a better year for me.

2. My new job

My new job started in October 2021. I just began here, but I hope it gives me better opportunities as it has already given me a better pay raise.

3. The COVID-19 heroes

I do believe, in the midst of chaos, and with honestly the back and forth of government protocols, that we will eventually get through this because of the nurses and healthcare workers who have not given up.

4. My mental health care team

I am starting to work with a regular therapist and OCD specialist to help guide me on my mental health journey to feeling better and controlling my anxiety that takes a toll on my life.

5. My parents

They give me support no matter how much I can be a pain to them. I have said things I regret but they are always there to help me.

6. My boyfriend’s family

My second family who I love, and lets me call them whenever I need them.

7. My loyal and hopeful new friends

Friends come and go. I hope some new ones stick around like the old ones.

8. My schooling

I am getting my master’s in human services and finish in June 2022. I am hopeful this will open more opportunities for me.

9. Exercising

This is cheesy, but working out keeps me in check with my body and health.

10. Sleep

This one may sound odd. When I am asleep, my troubles disappear for those moments and I am fine with that. It does not take away from the problems and it gives me relief to not think about something.

2022 is going to be an interesting year. We are almost two years into the pandemic. Mental health is on the rise. I have to take care of myself not for the sake of the pandemic but for myself. I am hoping 2022 can truly be a good year for me and that it will help change my life for the better. May 2022 bring me joy and happiness along with the health that I deserve.

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About the Author

Molly Rose lives in PA but is originally from NY. She wrote for Odyssey Online in 2017 and has now started her journey with Puckermob. Molly is getting her Master’s degree online in Human Services at Capella University. She is an advocate for individuals with disabilities. Follow her on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.

Vaccine awareness month: Navigating COVID-19 And The Delta Variant

An uptick in cases, the delta variant moving rapidly through the Untied States. Testimony of those from beyond and family members who regret not getting vaccinated. It’s time. 

Getting vaccinated means that we can get back to life again. Being able to see friends and family. Being able to give hugs and handshakes. Being able to get the support from our loved ones that we crave. 

And getting vaccinated means concerts, weddings and large gatherings again. Being able to enjoy other people’s company. Doing the things that you love. Celebrating the special events that so many have been cheated out of for the last year. 

Because getting vaccinated means traveling. Getting on that plan, or even just a road trip with friends. It means a chance to get away and do all of the fun things that come with vacation. Site seeing. Drinking at a bar

We know getting vaccinated means a togetherness that we have not had in over a year. However, what needs to be said is not getting vaccinated means getting sick. Means that the virus just keeps mutating. It means more time away from friends and family. It means not celebrating the big things. It means not mourning the losses we feel. It means not living life. 

Stay healthy, get vaccinated because it saves lives! 

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In A Post Pandemic World: Let’s Not Go Back To Normal

 

The world is opening up again, life is going back to “normal.” Although I am excited that for some things to get back to normal. Like hanging out with friends and family. There are somethings that I think we should not keep normalizing.

We have a population that is over worked and under paid. We have to stoping living like we are meant to just work. Let’s not take the time that we have had to rest and reevaluate how we are living, for granted. I think the summer time is the perfect time to create the balance in life that we all need, because there will be plenty of opportunity to get out and do the things that matter to you.

Pre- Covid, I worked all the time, I felt like if I wasn’t working I was wasting my time. I still work a lot, However, since covid and having the time to reconnect and do some of the things that I love. I now know the value of resting and recharging. So, here are some of the things that I am going to make a priority this summer and hopefully for the rest of my life.

Working on Myself

When covid first hit I decided this was a good time for me to start to learn to deal with some things in my life. Now that I have seen some progress and growth in myself. This is something that I am going to continue to work on, because it is so important to learn how to deal with the things that bother me. It helps me be the best person that I can be.

 

Using my Coping skills

Living with anxiety has been hard to navigate, and if you are like me Covid did not help. However, durning the pandemic I choose to start looking for my coping skills and now I am trying to practice them daily. (mine are: Writing, Exercising, Walking my dog, and Breathing) Find yours and do them when you are feeling overwhelmed or anxious by the world that we live in.

 

Taking Time out

Work is not everything, Yes we have to work and I get that, however, we also have to take time to do the things in life that you love. Go on a weekend get away with your love, go down to the lake and fish or walk on the beach. Head to the park and take a hike. Go do something that you love, something that is gonna make you smile, because again we should not live to work, we should be working to live our best lives. Spending time doing the things that actual matter. So step away from work and go listen to that baby laugh, go have dinner with your family, or just sit with yourself and reflect or just do nothing at all. Just take a time out.

 

Spend Time with Those That Matter

I think we can all agree that we spend enough time with our co-workers, and yes maybe we really enjoy them. However, we also should not that they are not the ones that matter most in your life. So, when your best friend calls you to go hang out take her up on the offer, when you get the call from your boyfriend about going out on the boat, throw your hair up grab a coozie and go. Have fun make memories because at the end of the day that is what you are going to want. That is how you will measure your life. So go do it, no it’s not selfish, and yes it is more important.

So, as the world opens back up to get back to “normal,” let’s not go back to “normal.” Let’s do more of what we love because let’s all be honest that is what we have been missing over the last year. Let’s take care of ourselves and let’s be happy again. Let’s let the the lessons of the pandemic not be forgotten. Do the things that matter.

Stay safe and stay healthy.

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10 Ways to Support Someone in Post-Vaccine Recovery 

 

World leaders, scientists and frontline medical personnel have been hard at work distributing and administering COVID-19 vaccines over the past three months. Now, more than 30% of Americans have received at least one dose, so odds are you know someone who’s recently received their shots. By now, they might even be complaining of soreness, fatigue or fever.

 

Luckily, these side effects are normal and should only last a few days as their bodies build immunity. Still, feeling crumby is never fun, even when there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Thus, if you’re looking to cheer up your friend or family member while they recover, the following ideas will help you offer support and encouragement.

Give Them a Call 

If your family member or friend is feeling a little under the weather, give them a call to cheer them up. Share a bit of juicy gossip, talk about the Netflix show they’re binging and ask for an update on their symptoms.

 

While most people will bounce back and recover from the vaccine within a few days, others may battle fatigue or soreness for more than a week. If they still feel awful after a few days of checking in, encourage them to call their doctor.

Send a Note

Sure, your friend should recover quickly, but it’s always nice to receive a get-well card when you’re sick. Send a note with a funny message, quote or a Bible verse to put a smile on their face and hope in their heart. Hand deliver the note, send it through the mail or drop it in their mailbox with a cookie or some other treat to brighten their day.

 

Watch the Kids

Does your recent vaccine recipient have children? Offer to watch them for a few hours — or a few days. They’ll be happy to get out of the house and mom and dad will be forever thankful for the chance to recover in a calm and quiet home. Meanwhile, you can explore the zoo, a local park, build a fort in your backyard with their little ones.

Put Together a Gift Basket

Help your friend relax with a personalized gift basket. Include a bath bomb, lotion, eye mask, Ibuprofen and other similar items. Then, think about their interests. Do they love sports? Consider adding something relevant to the basket. Would they rather watch sitcoms while they recover? Include some snack mix, popcorn or candy bars.

Bring Them Food

Sometimes, the vaccine will make the recipient’s arm hurt or cause their muscles to ache. In this case, they probably won’t want to do much mixing, scooping or whisking. Keep them out of the kitchen and on the road to healing by bringing them a meal or two. Consider making comfort foods that freeze and reheat well.

Drop Off Flowers

Practically everyone loves receiving flowers, especially if they’ll be stuck in bed for a few days. Bring a bright splash of color and a fresh scent into their home with a bouquet of flowers. If they’re plant people you might gift them a succulent or houseplant instead.

Offer to Mow Their Yard 

Spring is here, which means mowing season is right around the corner. If you notice their yard is in need of a trim — or their garden needs tending to — offer to help. Fertilize their garden, plant some bulbs, water the flowers and cut the grass. This way they’ll have one less thing to worry about while they take some time off from completing their to-do list.

Do Some Chores

You might also offer to help them around the house and complete a few chores. Do their laundry, make a grocery run, clean the kitchen or simply stop by and take the dog for a walk. These small acts of kindness will make a huge difference in their lives and give their mind a chance to rest, too.

Provide Entertainment

Drop off magazines, your favorite book or a funny movie to help your loved one pass the time. Odds are they’ll be more than a little bored if they’re stuck at home in bed all day. Alternatively, you can gift them a subscription to their favorite channel or a video game they’ve had their eye on for a while.

Stay With Them

If you’ve received your vaccine or deem it safe enough to stay with your loved one, offer to keep them company in person. Cook, clean and cheer them up by taking care of them and nursing them back to health. Just remember to respect their boundaries and try not to take it personally if they say no.

Stay Positive

The last thing your loved one probably wants to hear is news about the vaccine or your questions about its effectiveness or safety. After all, the dose is already in their body, so there’s no sense in needlessly frightening them or making them question their decision. Stay positive, be supportive and practice kindness.

About The Author

Oscar Collins is the managing editor at Modded. He writes about cars, fitness, the outdoors, and more. Follow @TModded on Twitter for more articles from the Modded team.

Here Are Five Reasons Why I Chose To Get My Covid-19 Vaccine.

I have heard many people talking about why or why not they got the Covid-19 vaccine. I think this is a very personal choice for everyone. So here are the reasons I chose to get vaccinated. 

My family:

I have family members who are immunology compromised. Thinking if I get the Covid-19 vaccine then I  could sill go out and avoid bringing this deadly virus home to them. A thought that had my anxiety very high. And I wanted to do everything I could to keep them safe. 

I want to go back to work:

Getting the Covid-19 Vaccine truly felt like a step in the right direction. I will be able to keep myself protected to go back into the classroom and help a teacher grow little minds. Although, I have been very blessed to stay home because of my family situation. I really am ready to get back to some normalcy again. 

Date nights out:

Ever since Covid my boyfriend and I keep date night at home. However,  really ready to get dressed do my hair and make up and have a night out with my love. 

Going back to in person learning at school:

I cannot wait to be able to get back on campus to do homework. To have some decommission time in the car after a long day. To get back to things being normal again!! 

I trust:

Because for me I trust in not only the national doctors who are telling us to get the Covid-19 vaccine, but I also trust the doctors who care for my family members who are asking that I do my part to keep them safe! 

My reasons for getting the vaccine are unique to my situation. And I believe that I made the best decision for me and for my family. All the while doing my part to help the country as a whole to get back to normal. So for me this was a no brainer. Because for me, it was for my family! 

So please stay safe, mask up, and consider getting vaccinated. 

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The 5 Keys To Acing a Virtual Interview

Virtual interviews were rising in popularity even before the pandemic. Now more than ever, they are a favored method for companies to screen candidates. While you may be asked the same questions as you would in an in-person interview, there are unique aspects to this interview style that you must consider. We share 5 key things you must do before a virtual interview.

1. Prepare for the questions

First things first, you will need to prepare for the interview itself and the questions you will potentially be asked. Preparation for virtual interview questions is identical to preparation for questions during in-person interviews.

Here are a variety of question types that are asked in an interview:

  • Fit: Questions that find out if you are a good fit for the position, team, and company.

    • Ex: Why do you want to work here?

  • Behavioral: Questions that gauge how you have acted in certain situations or how you would act in certain situations.

    • Ex: Talk to me about a time you encountered a problem while working in a group.

  • Technical: Questions specific to knowledge and abilities required for the position.

    • Ex: How would you conduct a marketing audit on a company?

  • Company/Industry Specific: Questions to test how much you know about the company and/or industry:

    • Ex: Who are our company’s competitors and how do we all differ?

Do your research to find out what questions are most commonly asked by the company you are interviewing with. Once you have gathered a healthy list of questions, create flashcards.

 

2. Carefully choose the location for your interview

The location and environment where you conduct your virtual interview should not be overlooked. You can choose a room in your house, your office, or a conference room at the library. It doesn’t matter where as long as the location has these key features:

  • Free from noise and distractions

  • Allows you to feel comfortable

  • Has a good internet connection

3. Ensure your technology works and that you have backups

For virtual interviews to happen, technology must be used. Typically, most interviews are conducted using the webcam on your computer.

Prior to your interview, you should run several tests on your tech.

Double-check that internet again to make sure the connection is strong and consistent.

As for your computer, you should check the following:

  • The webcam works and is wiped clean of dust and fingerprints.

  • The microphone picks up sound clearly.

Do some test runs and film yourself in the location you have chosen. How do you look on camera? How do you sound? Does your voice project at a normal conversation level or would you have to speak louder for the interviewers to hear you?

In the unlikely event that your computer doesn’t work, have backup options on hand. For example, if you are using your laptop for the interview, keep your tablet or phone nearby. If your laptop malfunctions, you can quickly switch over to another device.

4. Be conscious of appearances

Appearances matter a lot in a virtual interview. All the interviewers have to judge you by is what they see on the screen.

Your backdrop should have an aesthetically pleasing background; one that isn’t too loud nor too plain. Lighting is also important. Prior to your interview, figure out how to get lighting that complements your face and the background.

If you aren’t sure how to go about this, I’d advise you to go on YouTube and search “how to set up lighting for a virtual interview.”

5. Practice body language and voice

This key relates to appearances as well. You can help your case as a strong candidate through your body language and voice. With those two, you can communicate a lot more than you can with just your words.

Some research claims that up to 93% of communication is nonverbal! So, it’s best to take this seriously.

You want the interviewers to come away from the interview believing you are confident, competent, personable, comfortable, and coachable. How can you do that? Here are a few tips:

Body language

  • Sit upright with your shoulders back.

  • Use your hands while speaking when it feels appropriate.

  • Rest your hands in your lap when you aren’t using them.

  • Aim to be relaxed and loose rather than stiff.

  • When your interviewers are speaking, look engaged.

  • Don’t be afraid to smile.

Voice

  • Speak with “umph” and conviction in your responses.

  • Don’t speak too fast or too slow.

  • Change up the tonality of your voice so you aren’t monotone.

  • Don’t be afraid of pauses. Taking a second to think before you speak is fine and actually admirable.

To practice body language, set up a chair in front of the mirror. Role play, ask yourself the questions, and then answer the questions while looking in the mirror. Analyze your posture and what you do as you speak.

Additionally, you can record yourself on your webcam as if the real interview was happening. Now you can analyze your body language and your voice too. Are you speaking at an appropriate pace? Are you saying “um” or “like” a lot? How can you change up your tone of voice on certain answers to make them more impactful?

Observe, refine, implement, and repeat. Follow that sequence until you are ready to ace the virtual interview.

 

About The Author

Brandon Hill is the creator of Bizness Professionals, a resource to current or aspiring young professionals for well-rounded growth and career development. Outside of his blog, he continues to work in the field of finance.

How to Enjoy Sports Even During a Pandemic

The COVID-19 pandemic has affected a lot of aspects of people’s lives, including the enjoyment of sports. Restrictions were implemented, such as the limitation on contact sports, fewer audiences for live games, and even cancellation of scheduled games. 

Good thing that there are still available ways to enjoy sports even during this pandemic. You can play non-contact sports, watch live streaming online or through the TV, or participate in online sports betting. 

 

Importance of sports during the pandemic

Sports unite people, no matter the age, gender, and social status. It also is an important factor in social and economic development. It empowers the children, individuals, and communities. It also contributes to education, health, and social inclusion. 

However, with the declaration that COVID-19 is a pandemic, the sports world went spiraling down. It started with the suspension of games following the confirmation of positive athletes and staff, postponing upcoming sports events to hinder the spread of the virus. 

Good thing that normal life is starting to resume these days.The mental and physical health of the people should still be thought about. Regulations were put in place to make sure that the health of the people is not jeopardized while also making sure that people can still enjoy sports despite the pandemic. People are still encouraged to stay at home. If people still want to play sports or exercise, they can do so but for a limited time only. 

Aside from playing sports during the pandemic, athletes also play an important role in using their platforms to help others. For one, they can spread awareness and information on the importance of hygiene and health. Second, they can be a vehicle for donations to help those affected by the pandemic. Third, they can become an inspiration to people and be a platform for change. 

 

Play non-contact sports

If you’re the type of person that cannot stay still without sweating it out through sports or workouts, then you can play non-contact sports. The Centers for Disease Control (CDC) and Prevention recommends a limitation of 10 people for team sports. These sports include volleyball, basketball, and softball. 

However, this does not mean that you cannot play sports anymore. If you want to play, make sure that you follow the guidelines set by the CDC. First, you should adhere to physical distancing for at least 6 feet. Second, wear masks. Third, mind your respiratory etiquette and hand hygiene. Fourth, maintain a healthy environment with your co-players.  

 

Live streaming

With COVID-19 restrictions slowly loosened, sports leagues are starting to do live events and live streaming. The UFC made its first live event in May 2020. NASCAR returned also in May after a 2-month hiatus. Germany and Spain’s soccer also returned to live events. 

The return of live events and live streaming decreased the TV viewership of sports events. With everything going digital and online, people are now watching live games and events on online streaming sites. Sports news is also now easily accessible online, perfect for those whose sporting calendars are busy and crowded. 

 

Online sports betting

Not everyone who likes sports wants to play, others participate in online sports betting. The excitement and predictions are what make betting fun for bettors. Online sports betting has been around for quite some time now. However, it boomed during the pandemic due to people staying in their homes instead of making bets in the field. 

There are many sports where you can make a bet online. These sports are the following:

 

1. Horse racing

A lot of horse racing tracks put on hold their racers, while others continued without any spectators. The upcoming races you can bet on are the Belmont Stakes, Preakness Stakes, Breeders’ Cup, and Kentucky Derby.

 

2. Mixed Martial Arts

The Ultimate Fighting Championship shortly put on hold their games because of the pandemic. However, there are already scheduled games for people to enjoy. UFC Fight Night: Blaydes vs. Lewis and UFC 259 are confirmed to be happening. 

 

3. Football 

The NFL has previously canceled its preseason last year. However, the 102nd season has already resumed. The length of the season is contingent, depending on the effects of the pandemic. Betting for the NFL is still ongoing. 

The NCAA is also happening this March 2021. There is a planned single-elimination tournament and will conclude in Indiana due to the pandemic and the cancellation of the tournament last year.

Online sports betting is simple. First, you look for a website to bet on, depending on the type of bet you want. Second, you make an account. Third, deposit on your account through credit card, debit card, or any way you can deposit on your account. Fourth, research on who you want to bet on. Lastly, make your bet and hope for the best.

 

Final Words

The COVID-19 pandemic affected many aspects of the lives of people, including sports. Although there might be restrictions to working out and playing sports, you can still enjoy sports even during the pandemic. You can play non-contact sports, watch live streaming online or through the TV, or participate in online sports betting.

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About The Author

Belinda is a 42-year-old married mother of three who lives in Naples, Florida. While staying at home to raise her children, she began to write articles and blogs for various outlets. She was raised in a strict, Christian home, but has since found more peace with a more spiritual approach to life and health. A strong believer in natural and alternative medicine, energy healing, and total wellness, she stumbled on the health benefits of orgasm quite by accident. Since then, she has often written pieces that help inform others about the benefits she discovered. Belinda also enjoys taking care of her home and family, and often jokes that she is a bit of a Stepford wife… with a wild side. In her free time, she loves to spend time at the beach with her family, host parties and BBQ’s, and work outside in one of her many flower gardens.

Renew And Restore In Faith, Unity And Optimism.

I have been very vocal about the fact that I have found hope in the new administration. Here are the hopes I have, and yes I think this administration can renew and restore unity and optimism. 

 

United we Will Stand: 

Although we have fundamental differences when it comes to policy. I do think that we can all stand United and work together for the common good of America and Americans. Joe Biden is someone who has always fought for Americans even when it means reaching across the isle to do so. What I think we have to remember is, we are all Americans at the end of the day. We are all in this together. We are all striving for a better life and the only way to get there is to learn to co-exist and work together. 

 

The Pursuit Of Justice and Accountability

This is not something that is going to happen overnight. Nor do I believe we can have a complete reform on justice in four years. I do, however, believe that this administration will start the process. It is my great hope that one day minorities will be able to leave their house without fear. That people who act by violence will be held more accountable than a non-violent first offender criminal. It is my hope that women and men will be able to come out and say I was assaulted and be believed and taken seriously. I know these are things we are going to have to continue to fight for, but I think now we have an ally in the White House to help lead the charge.

 

We the People Will Have Access to Healthcare

This is such a basic human right and need is proper healthcare. It is my belief that this administration will do everything they can to see to it that every American has access to healthcare when they need it. Instead of taking it away. That we can figure it out so that yes you can keep your plan, but if you can’t afford it you have an option. I also think that this administration shows its commitment by putting comprehensive plans together to deal with the pandemic, as well as, putting more money into medical research. 

 

Post Pandemic Life Will Be Restored

It’s been less than a week and we have already seen great strides to combat the pandemic. I’m so hopeful that one day soon I’ll be able to enjoy a night out on the town with good friends and my boyfriend. That we won’t have to think about all the great events that we have coming up with a pandemic and picking and choosing who should be there because of the restrictions. That I will be able to do my job to the fullest again. That we will get back to a normal way of life because we finally have direction coming from the top. 

These are just some of the reasons why I have so much hope. There are so many more. But I have that hope knowing that this administration cannot accomplish everything that we want in the next four years. I know that it is going to take many more to come. That we are going to have to keep voting to see the changes that we want. So because of this hope I’m committed to voting for these changes in the midterms and the next presidential election

I hope that you are also ready to renew and restore optimism and faith and are committed to seeing these changes happen. 

Don’t forget to vote

COVID-19 – Waiting for the End Game

We all want to know when the end game of this all is, as it seems like a reoccurring nightmare. And the truth is, we really don’t know. It’s a nightmare that seems to keep going and going – and we keep hoping that tomorrow the face masks will be no more and we can all go out to bars and party, but the reality is that we don’t really know when that’s going to happen, as it seems to literally be one day at a time.

The point of me personally writing this article, and this is all just my opinion, is yes – it really does suck that we are living through this and we really don’t know when life will go back to normal.

That’s just it, though – will life ever be normal again?

We have so many harsh effects from the pandemic and it’s going to linger on for quite a bit. Businesses are going to have to build back up again while people need to recover from losses of those who died from COVID-19. More than ever, we need to help each other out instead of being divided and this is the most political I have ever been in my whole life. 

It can be normal. but we’ll never forget the harsh effects that the pandemic had on so many lives. I do believe a future pandemic will occur due to climate change, for instance, unless we get our stuff together. We need to realize that this unfortunately won’t be the last pandemic and that we should learn from this for generations to come.

We all could have followed protocols better to perhaps slow the spread of COVID 19, but government rulers also could have been more diligent in helping us navigate through the COVID 19 crisis.

So, as COVID-19 surges on, here is what I personally believe we can continue to do to help navigate us through this crisis:

First off, we really don’t have an end game yet – maybe by summer or fall the COVID-19 pandemic will get better. Individuals should listen to science and wear masks as they have been proven to help protect others. Are they annoying to wear? Of course. But we can help so many people be safe.

However, secondly, I do believe that if one truly believes they are at risk of getting very sick from COVID-19, stay home.

Third, keep businesses open in a safe manner and just wear the mask at a store. We don’t need stores closing and people losing jobs and money.

Lastly, be kind to others and make sure you always have others to support you during this tough time. There have been times I wanted to cry and even had panic attacks about the never-ending saga (so it seems) of COVID-19 – but you truly are not alone. Call or FaceTime someone or have a social distance date and keep the connections going.

So, we really don’t know the end game of COVID-19, but we can do our best and hope; as cheesy as that sounds.

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I Went on a Covidate: Here’s How it Went

And The book title is “Love in the Time of Cholera,” but it’s hard to not reimagine it for the 21st century.  Love in the Time of COVID, am I right? It was hard enough to find a special spark when we weren’t afraid to be around each other with our faces exposed.

I personally do miss kissing boys in cocktail bars while drinking old fashions, accompanied only by the flickering light of a nearby candle.

Those days are long gone and the only old fashions I’m drinking are solo and in bed with a battery-operated candle. Safety first.

I waitress at a restaurant in downtown Manhattan where every so often a man at my table will ask me for my number. Sometimes I’m flattered, sometimes appalled; it all usually depends on how they go about it, as well as their etiquette during dinner. I’ve dated a few guys I met while working in the past, but none of them really last. The flirtation on my side usually boils down to admittedly entertaining myself throughout the evening’s conundrum of 86s and asshole guests.

Any of these flirtations usually boil down to somewhere in between an unanswered text message and a maximum of a three-week relationship that could have definitely been capped at two weeks had I trusted my instincts.

In the time of COVID, the ante has been upped by mandatory face coverings for all employees. Listen, I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy the game of flirting with a mask on, using only my eyes to lure them in and get them to ask me out without ever having seen my face. It’s amazing. A few months ago I swore I had met Carrie Underwood’s husband’s twin. I simultaneously took an order at a table across the room while making eyes at him, which lead to him following me to the computer in order to get my number. Unfortunately, the head chef walked past as I was entering my digits in his phone and screamed, “Get it, Kaitlyn!” across the restaurant.

He texted me, and I answered in my Uber home, despite his initial text saying that I was a wonderful waitress (Tip #1: if you’re attempting to pick up your waitress, never compliment her waitressing skills. She doesn’t want to be a good waitress and she definitely doesn’t want to hear about how she’s a good waitress. Chances are she’s some type of artist that loathes her survival job, so get outta here with your waitressing compliments). He asked when I’d be available in the upcoming week to “grab a bite,” and I told him we’d have to wait until I got my schedule – when what I really meant was I need time to figure out a way to say,

“Um there’s a pandemic, and I actually like my lungs working at full capacity, so can we take a socially distanced walk instead?”

The next day I texted him to strike up casual conversation, and my “Happy Sunday! You a football fan?” text was left unanswered, so my problems were solved. This event is what led me to be even more impressed by my most recent approach.

I had a table of six guys that had been making jokes with me on and off all night. And I usually hate serving tables of men, because, well, men, but this was a fun, harmless group. I was standing in the far corner of the dining room as they began to make their exit. One of them started approaching me, and I felt an instant glitter of excitement.

“Hey, I know everything is complicated right now with COVID, so I’m just going to give you my number and you can decide what to do with it.”

I know that my shock showed in my response. “Oh! Thank you,” I said as I took the small, folded up paper from his hand while doing my best to show him I appreciated his approach. He nodded and walked off into the night.

I was absolutely touched that he even acknowledged that things are undoubtedly complicated right now. If dating in New York was difficult before, which it was, it’s now ten-fold. Hell, one hundred-fold. Ya can’t just go kissing strangers and drinking gin and tonics like ya used to. Like many other things this year, what used to be hard just got harder. I always felt like most dates were a waste of time, but now I’m risking my life for them, too? How bout just get me a petri dish for my eggs because I’m going to need several more years to figure this shit out. Count me out and Amazon Prime me a cat to start my collection with.

I admit he put me under a spell with his genuine approach, and I couldn’t help but shoot him a text (obviously after waiting the preliminary 24 hours just to make him sweat). I know, I know, I’m part of the problem… So I’ve heard.

Any who, we texted for a day or so before he made his advance: “Usually I’d engage in some more witty text banter, but I’m going to be more forward because I’m leaving the city for Thanksgiving. Any chance you’re free for a drink tomorrow or Tuesday?”

Ugh. Well, that was a fun day of socially distanced flirting but here’s where it ends, I told myself.  My response was honest but very blunt. “To be honest, I’m not really hanging out with people unless it’s outside and with a mask on,” I said, expecting to get some sort of attempt at persuasion back or just a total lack of interest. That’s why when he responded by being totally understanding and “down to play by my rules,” I couldn’t help but perk up.

With his work schedule and mine combined, along with the pressure of the upcoming holiday and constraints of the pandemic, we had an 11:00 a.m. coffee date in Washington Square Park in 26-degree weather. As fate would have it, it was the coldest day of the year so far. He still had not seen my face and I was attempting to wear lipstick under my mask, but I was becoming less confident as I walked to meet him and my snot ran into my KN95 from the blustery temps. Sexy.

We grabbed a coffee and walked to the park, carefully picking a bench in the sunlight to keep us a little warm. I knew as soon as I pulled my mask down to take a sip of my oat latte he was going to see my face for the first time, so I made a joke as I turned my head and wiped my snot on the back of my glove. We shared a bench but kept our masks on as we got to know each other.

It was honestly really refreshing to sit across from someone in the light of day and without the help of alcohol or the distraction of physical attraction. It was nice to know that this is as far as it would go for a while. There was no pressure to end the date with a kiss and certainly no shot at more than that.

We got approached by homeless men asking for money a few times, but only one offered a magic show. He was wearing a mask so we accepted. During his routine, he got a tiny bit too close to me and my date must’ve seen me lean back ever so slightly. He kindly asked the man to take back up a bit. It may seem like a small gesture but it went a hell of a long way in my book. I felt like someone other than myself was looking out for me, which is something that has barely happened this year.

In the past 10 grueling months I’ve lost some friends because of their irresponsible response to the virus. I’ve also grown closer and came to appreciate the friends that share my values.

The magician’s trick somehow revealed that I was 28 and he was 26 which was alarming to me. My general rule is to not look twice at any man under thirty. It is 2020, though, and I’ve had to break some old rules as well as come up with some new ones, so what the hell.

He also revealed that when he said he was going home for Thanksgiving (to Tampa) he would be staying there through the New Year, followed by a trip to the Grand Canyon for some hiking in early January. Our conversation continued for well over an hour before deciding to go for a stroll, which led to a pop-up shop, which led to picking up his lunch from Cava, and then dropping him off at his apartment on Houston.

He asked permission to hug me, which I surprised myself by allowing, and we said our goodbyes. “I don’t know how this works, but I had a really good time and I’d like to do it again?” “Same,” I responded while we both laughed at the uncertainty of it all.

On the hunt for new martini glasses, I slipped into Crate and Barrel. He had texted me before I even left the store and our witty text banter continued until the second week of December. And he must have sensed my uncertainty in what we were doing and ended things with me before I could do it with him. He sent me a full screen sized text message about his workload, the holidays, and the uncertainty of his return to New York anytime soon. And he said he’d text me when he gets back to the city, and I said the next cappuccino is on me.

I feel like I won’t hear from him again, and if I do, the cappuccino would have to be just a friendly cappuccino. I didn’t really feel a spark and felt like I couldn’t get past the age difference. That doesn’t negate how touched I was by his manners and respect to my boundaries. I really appreciated his genuine interest in getting to know me and make me feel safe. Funny enough, this was just four days over my average three-week relationship, so the end came right on schedule.

Regardless of the fact that our tryst didn’t end in either of us being swept off our feet, there is much to be learned from this experience.

Don’t be afraid to set boundaries: If someone is truly interested in you they will be willing to act within the confines of your comfort zone. If they’re not willing, they’re not worth it. If you’re getting involved with someone romantically it is crucial that you can be open about what you’re comfortable with.

That means with COVID and literally everything else. Boundaries are healthy, but you have to be willing to own them and speak them into existence. It may mean you lose some people, but those that stay truly respect you.

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About The Author

Kaitlyn-Renee Urban is an actor and writer with a passion for highlighting feminism in the arts. She hosts an IGTV show (coming January 2021) called “What We Know Now” centered around supporting local, women-run businesses while picking their brains for advice they’d give their younger selves. She lives in New York City, but it’s easier to find her on Instagram.

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