post-breakup Archives

The Struggle Of Trying To Forget Someone You Truly Love

When a love so intense and pure blooms in your heart, you can never make it disappear out of existence when the relationship ends. Love’s a force that is so powerful that it could never be extinguished. You can tame your heart from yearning for what you’ve lost, but you can never truly erase the impact that loving so intensely has on your heart and soul.

You should come to terms with the fact that forgetting someone you love is only possible if your love was never unconditional.

But you loved passionately and intensely, so all you can really do is try to compromise with your heart on how you’ll begin to live with the memories that he left behind; the sound of his voice and how amazing it felt when he caressed your hair.

He ignited all your senses, so it’s almost as if the DNA of his soul has made its way through yours and found a forever home.

You can try to be practical with your feelings towards that person and negotiate with your heart on how much thinking about the past can be detrimental to your heart.

It won’t happen overnight, but one day soon, you’ll begin to notice that the thought of him doesn’t sting anymore.

Because the truth is, the past stays in the past, the good and bad. As much as it might hurt, even if he was the most amazing person your soul has ever come to known, he was just a chapter in your life.

Coping with the pain every time the memory of him lurks in is all you can do because forgetting the love that you shared is futile.

Right now the love that lives in your heart is more powerful than any logic that you might want to inject to your overthinking mind so that you can stop the pain.

Rational thinking has no place in how your emotions work, especially in those days you miss him most.

You might fear that you will never be able to live without the pressure on your chest that makes you hold your breath at the thought of him, screaming for one last kiss.

But closure is not something you will find outside of yourself. It will not come from him, it will happen when you choose to let your emotions run its natural course, pain and all. So be strong and patient with your heart.

You will be able to live without him and with the memory of what you had. He was not meant to be your forever, even if you think that no one else will be able to see right through you as he did.

The truth is, the love you have for him and all the memories that you’ve built are eternal but the pain of losing him is not.

You will move on and you’ll be able to see the big picture. Embrace where you are with your feelings right now. Those feelings are just an indication of your ability to love, so don’t let them break you.

Instead, let your ability to love to show you how much you can grow from loving and losing him. Because in the end, your heart is big enough to love as many times as you possibly can and to hold all those memories in a special place in your heart forever.

You Were My Everything, Now I Don’t Know How To Live Without You

The actual breakup was a whirlwind of emotions. It was confusing, shocking and honestly, didn’t process right away. When I heard those four awful words strung together with so much apathy that I just sort of went numb. “We should break up” was the last thing I heard and from that moment on, I was just going through the motions. It didn’t hit me until way after that moment that it hit me, how do I live without you?

Waking up in the morning, I roll over to grab my phone to check for that usual “good morning” text but instead, I find an empty screen. My heart drops into my chest and that dreaded conversation starts playing on a loop in my mind.

I walk into the kitchen and pour only one cup of coffee instead of two. I start missing the little things, being told I was beautiful before I put on any makeup, that quick kiss before I left to start my day and knowing that someone was always waiting for me when my day ended.

Most of all, I miss what I used to be. The memory isn’t what keeps my heart heavy; it’s all the mental images that come flooding over me all at once. It’s walking past a place that I created so many memories together. I catch tears slowly slipping from my eyes.

I’m left feeling alone, not wanting to bother my friends with my troubles but needing an outlet to let it all go.

It’s realizing that I have to start completely over, with no idea how to do it. And what kills me the most is people who tell me I’ve been sad for ‘too long’ and I just have to ‘get back out there.’ They were not there when we cuddled on the couch watching TV, or for dinner dates, selfies, or the first time he said: “I love you.”

They may have been through their own heartbreak but they don’t exactly know how I’m feeling, so I won’t downplay how hurt I am.

The truth is, it hurts because it was real.

It hurts because there were real feelings involved. The next bit of truth is eventually it will get better.

When he left he took a little piece of that away with him. There are going to be tears, there will be lots of them. I know I’ll look for him when I’m out and about even though I know I shouldn’t, I may even pick up a phone knowing that it’s a bad idea. It’s all part of the process.

The pain is overwhelming because my heart didn’t just belong to me, it belonged to him as well.

I will get over this relationship, but it’ll be in my own way, until I feel okay because if I don’t allow myself to feel okay, then I’m just going to hurt myself in the long run.

The breakup goes by quickly, but the pain will take a while to heal. So in the meantime, I’ll be taking it one day at a time.

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46 Pieces Of Our Life Together That Still Hurt To Part With Post Breakup

When a relationship ends, it’s devastating because you don’t realize all the things you are actually losing. You aren’t just losing a person, you’re losing all the little things that came along with it.

1. You lose the ability to call him whenever you want.

2. You remove the lock screen photo of the two of you.

3. You take down all the photos off the walls.

4. You lose the feeling of him rolling over in the middle of the night and putting his arms around you.

5. You say goodbye to the way he smelled right after he got out of the shower.

6. Or the way he smelled when he wore your favorite cologne.

7. You say goodbye to that over-sized sweatshirt of his that you always wore.

8. You say goodbye to the sound of his laugh.

9. You say goodbye to the way he pulled your hair out of your face.

10. You say goodbye to the way his lips felt on yours.

11. You say goodbye to the way your heart fluttered every time he lifted your chin to kiss you.

12. His voice telling you he loved you becomes a faded memory.

13. You say goodbye of the days you spent under the sheets.

14. You say goodbye to the way he always knew if something was wrong.

15. You say goodbye to the little surprises he’d bring you to show he cared.

16. You say goodbye to the cute little moments where he was romantic when he wasn’t even trying.

17. You say goodbye to coffee dates.

18. You say goodbye to having him in your corner.

19. You say goodbye to always having a dinner date.

20. You say goodbye always knowing who your plus 1 was.

21. You say goodbye to the friends you’ve made together.

22. You say goodbye to his family, which had become like a second family to you.

23. You say goodbye to a chapter of your life.

24. You say goodbye to the familiar.

25. You say goodbye to texting him when you’re lonely.

26. You say goodbye to the one person you could be yourself in front of.

27. You say goodbye to countless adventures.

28. You say goodbye to the arms that wrapped you close when you felt yourself breaking down.

29. You say goodbye to good morning texts.

30. You say goodbye to knowing one person would never let you go to bed upset.

31. You say goodbye to having someone reassure you how great you are.

32. You say goodbye to him calling you beautiful even when you have no makeup on.

33. You say goodbye to the way his hand fit perfectly in yours.

34. You say goodbye to the person who knew every little detail about you.

35. You say goodbye to the man who drove you crazy and happy all at once.

36. You say goodbye to knowing after one too many shots him being a phone call away.

37. You say goodbye to weekend brunches in bed.

38. You say goodbye to cuddling on the couch watching Sunday night football.

39. You say goodbye to being his girl.

40. You say goodbye to all the little things he did that you hated but secretly loved.

41. You say goodbye to all the future plans you thought of with him.

42. You let go of the “what ifs”?.

43. You stop thinking of the “should have been”?.

44. You lose the title of his girlfriend.

45. You say goodbye to your Snapchat streak.

46. Ultimately you say goodbye to your best friend.

To see more of Audi’s work check out her facebook page.

This Is Why Guys Go Silent After A Breakup And How To Cope With It

Why won’t he call? Can’t he just have a conversation to give me some peace of mind? What’s wrong with him? What did I do to deserve this? Did I really mean this little to him? These are the questions that echo in our heads after a breakup from hell. Walking away from a relationship without even the slightest bit of closure can drive a girl crazy and cause a lot of sleepless nights. But the truth is, guys, go silent after a break up for a reason, and here’s how to cope with it.

Sometimes closure looks differently than we imagine it. Sometimes we don’t get all of the answers we’re seeking. Sometimes it’s not wrapped in a pretty bow with two people who amicably say “this is for the better.” And most times, we just have to find it in our own ways.

Do you think most people can easily admit their fears? Of course, we all would like our partner to care enough to tell us the truth no matter how much it hurts, but that’s almost never the case. Guys handle breakups in their own ways and the product of their own healing is silencing us out.

They don’t spend their days over-analyzing every second we spent with them, wondering where it all went wrong, trying to pinpoint the exact moment they sensed the downfall.

In fact, they won’t put much effort into thinking about the breakup at all. In their minds, it’s more general events: how the breakup happened and what the main reason for why it fell apart. Their lack of overthinking leads to silence because they don’t need any questions answered, they don’t want to know much more than what they already do. If they were to reach out, it could only potentially hurt them more, so they remain, silent and safe in their uncomplicated mindset.

We find it comforting to vent to a friend about a breakup and crave advice on how to handle it, while guys do the exact opposite.

Maybe they’ll have a quick, “we broke up” conversation with their bro’s and most likely call us ‘crazy’ and that they “just couldn’t do it anymore,” but it doesn’t go much deeper than that. Guy friends skip the emotional-healing aspect of a breakup and head towards the binge-drinking, bar hopping, sloppy nights out instead, doing whatever it takes to get the breakup off his mind.

Guys are just wired differently, they don’t need the same support girls require after a breakup.

Their reaction is silence because it’s the easiest way to deal with the emotions that are flooding in, otherwise, they wouldn’t know what to do with them.

So in order to cope, us girls need to pause and think.

Take a deep breath and tell yourself, “I will figure this out.” Don’t take on their issues and make them your own. Realize that we all have insecurities, and not all of us can understand how they impact us.

The best thing you can do is take it as a sign from the universe that it’s time to move on…

…and that any person worthy of being your partner would never leave you in the lurch like that. Remember this saying, “If not this, something better.” These words sound stupid and irritating when your relationship has just ended, but they are true for a reason.

We don’t always get what we want, but we get what we need.

Change is inevitable. Change is good. If it was meant to be, it would have been, and if it is meant to be, it will be. Unfortunately, life doesn’t always go along with our preconceived notions of how things should be, and people aren’t always what we want and need them to be. Life isn’t always wrapped up in a pretty package with a bow on top. Sometimes you get closure and sometimes you don’t. Sometimes the lack of closure is the very lesson that you needed to learn. Maybe you needed to learn to validate yourself and accept yourself.

Consider seeing this person as a gift sent to you.

They were brought to you as a reflection of yourself. Thank them for being a part of your journey and send them on their way in your mind.

If you are waiting for your ex to give you closure, it might be time to dig deep inside and give it to yourself. To heal a wound you need to stop touching it.

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If Your Heart Feels Permanently Bound to Him, Read This

Love really never proved to be on your side in the past, but you never gave up on it. And no matter what happened in your life, you kept an open mind and a giving heart. It doesn’t really make sense and it’s definitely nowhere near fair.

You had your life, and sure there were things you wish you could change or struggles you could live without, but you did the best you could and found your “happy enough”.

But even so, you never expected that an extraordinary love could make its way into the cracks of your heart, so when he came along, your world just turned upside down.

He promised a future you only ever dreamt about.

You felt safe with him but also, like you were on the adventure of a lifetime. He loved you in a way no other person, let alone man ever had.

Your life felt purposeful and your love felt meaningful.

This wasn’t some mediocre love you could control, it just felt bigger than the two of you.

So when it got too big for him to handle, he walked away.

You had your life, you were happy with it, but you never settled and still you feel punished.

It’s not your fault, and you didn’t deserve to feel something so magical for only a short bit of time just have to return to a life without it. That’s not an easy thing to cope with, especially when none of it was what you wanted.

And even if you know, deep down, that he’s not the one, or that you can do better, it doesn’t mean you’re wrong to hurt or even still want what you had.

It may not have been a forever kind of love, but none the less you felt the strength and potential of love and how it can change every aspect of your life. And that is just not something you move on from.

You carry that feeling in your heart forever, and you should never be ashamed of that. He gave you that feeling, so whether you want to or not, there will just always be a connection to him.

And right now, it may be unbearably painful to feel like you may never get him out of your heart but when your heart heals and doesn’t feel so heavy, you’ll be glad to have the extra weight.

Because there will come a time when you stop religiously checking his social media accounts or waiting for a text from him.

Even the thought of another moment without him won’t overwhelm you. It won’t happen at once, but there will be a day when you’re more focused on your life that you slowly let go of him as the person you were supposed to spend forever with.

So for now, love him as long as you need to because one day he will be an important piece of the puzzle. One day, you will remember how he made you feel loved, and you will remember this heartbreak and you will know exactly what you want from someone else.

One day all the pieces will fit together, and you’ll really truly feel a love you’ll never have to live without.

The Heartbreaking Truth Behind Breaking up With Someone You Still Love

“I cannot compromise my respect for your love. You can keep your love, I will keep my respect.” – Amit Kalantri

When you’re so in love it never crosses your mind to ever walk away from that person, at least not willingly. It’s not until you find yourself caught in the biggest dilemma of your life – Having no option but to end a relationship where your love still as strong as ever. The cruel reality that leaves you torn and jaded.

It’s you don’t want to but you have to that hurts the most because you can fathom walking away because your heart is already in sync with his. You can’t possibly imagine life without him and the thought of leaving him stings your soul.

You and he felt right, felt perfect and never ending until he let you down, not once but one too many times.

At first, it felt as if part of loving someone meant hurting once in a while and overcoming a few disappointments but he took it way too far. Turns out, loving someone doesn’t mean you have to sacrifice who you are in order to fulfill the other person’s needs.

You started to realize that you were giving more to the relationship that he was, you started seeing that he was getting too comfortable getting more and giving less and you could no longer justify his lack of effort.

The great future that you’ve pictured together started to feel more like a distant dream rather than an absolute possibility.

As your love grew stronger for him, his loyalty for you was being stretched too thin.

It’s not the fairytale that your heart envisioned and it’s definitely not what you deserve. You don’t deserve to stay awake at night trying to figure out what’s in his heart.

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