To the Man Who Chooses Me

To the Man Who Chooses Me:

Our relationship has been easy. As I have unpacked my past trauma, you have been there through the whole process. We have had so many ups and downs. We have made it through them all, mostly with your reassurance. This stage has been hard on us.

C,

No matter what we have been through, you choose me. You choose to love me… To hold me through the hardest of times, and stand next to me as I fight the battles that are mine. You are on the sidelines cheering me on while I chase my dreams! For these things, I love you so much.

Thank you for showing me what true, safe love is. I never knew a safe love like I do now, thanks to you. When I feel unsteady, you lay with me, hold me, and tell me that it’s all going to be okay. You listen to my overthinking and try to give me the spin on it so that it all doesn’t seem as bad as it does in my head.

Thank you for showing me what real love is. You love my flaws and all; including the fact that you can make fun of them. You don’t care about the fancy dates or me getting all dressed up. I do notice the look in your eye when I do, though. I also know that you’d rather me be in an old t-shirt with my hair pulled back. We have a Sunday kind of love and it’s all I wanted and more.

Thank you for loving me through the hard times. You are always there no matter when I need you. From changing the flat on my car to holding me close after a nightmare to listening to me dump my stuff from the day. You have no idea how good it feels to have someone to call on after all the years of doing it alone.

Thank you for being the one to dream with me. I love that you look at houses with me and help me try to construct or dream house that will be functional and not too big. I love that you will sit with me and update our list of names for our future child (p.s. we need one for our future fur babies, too). Thank you for working so hard so that we can make our dreams a reality one day.

Thank you for being so wonderful you, your imperfections and all. I wouldn’t want you any other way. But I love all the things about you. From when I come out and you are in your truck singing along to your favorite country song. To the way your hair being a mess when I video chat you on my lunch.

You are the one and I’m so blessed to be able to spend this crazy life with you. I love you so much.

  • A note to you ladies out there, your safe love that is so unconditional imperfect is coming. Don’t settle for anything less!

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5 Signs You’re Just In Lust, Not In Love

Love, as we know it, is a very difficult and confusing emotion to understand. Love, more often than not, tends to be mistaken for lust. Sometimes, it’s hard to completely tell the difference between the two. People romanticize love to be this all-consuming feeling that sometimes, we think lust – which is similar in emotional responses as love – is actually love. However, love radiates true happiness and most importantly, allows you to feel comfortable with yourself and your partner; whereas lust does not.  When you are able to distinguish the difference between love and lust, there is no comparison to how great love really feels over lust.

1.

You’re In Lust When:

You feel like you have to “dress to impress” every time you are seeing your person.

You’re In Love When:

You feel comfortable in “sweatpants, hair tied, chilling with no makeup on” all the time.

Being in love brings that sense of comfort in yourself and in your relationship. You know when you are in love because you feel comfortable being in comfortable wearing anything – like sweats –without worrying that your significant other is going to leave you for the girl dressed to the nines next door. You feel like you have to dress to impress when it’s lust because you’re not trusting or sure of where things are going. When its love, you know you don’t have to impress anyone.

2.

You’re In Lust When:

You always feel like you have to tell your significant other what they want to hear in order to keep them around.

You’re In Love When:

You feel confident saying whatever it is that you want, and sharing your views and opinions with your significant other.

The thing about love is that when you are in it, you know that there is nothing you can say that will make the person you are with love you any less. You know that your significant other loves you for you and all that you believe in – especially your mind. You don’t have to say things to string your significant other along and keep them with you. There’s no lying between you, no sugarcoating.

3.

You’re In Lust When:

You don’t know much about their life before you.

You’re In Love When:

You know everything about their past, their family, and their history.

A relationship filled with love is one that is an open book. When it is just lust, you are so protective of the relationship and holding it together on a whim that you don’t even bother to hit the history books on one another. If you don’t know anything personal about your significant other than do you really love them fully for who they truly are? Probably not, and it is probably just lust.

4.

You’re In Lust When:

You look at your significant other as just that, and not your best friend.

You’re In Love When:

You’re significant other has become one of your best friends.

Your significant other becomes a best friend when you are really in love because it happens so naturally. If you do not look at your significant other as your best friend too, it could be because you two are in a relationship that’s surface value or looks. Lust focuses on this, rather than focusing on a future or something sustainable.

5.

You’re In Lust When:

You focus on living in the moment with your significant other and never think about the future.

You’re In Love When:

You think about the future and what your life could really be like together – long term.

When you’re in love with someone, you envision a future together. When you feel love, you want to feel loved forever because once you experience that feeling, there’s no turning back. Therefore you don’t just focus on living in the moment because yes, that is important too but, you think about a life together and things that can happen in the long-run. When you love someone, you value them as a huge part of your life. You don’t only think about how great it is now, but how great it can be forever.

One Person Perfectly Described What Happens After You Lose The ‘Butterflies’ In A Relationship

If you’re ever been in a long-term relationship, you’d know first-hand that they are a lot of work. When you first meet someone, you’re happy, giddy, excited to get to know them and see where your relationship goes. As you progress in your relationship – transitioning from casual dating to a real relationship, a lot of things change. Long gone are the days where you blush, get embarrassed or nervous in front of your significant other – and instead, you reach a peak comfort zone with them. While this is never a bad thing – all long-term relationships should aspire to reach this place – some people are always worrisome when the “butterflies” and “Honeymoon stage” comes to an end.

People are always looking for ways to bring back that “excitement and spark” in their relationships, instead of feeling comfortable or happy with where their relationships are moving. Take it from someone who has been here – who is here – in their life. Once you reach new stages in your relationship – meeting your partner’s family, moving in together, traveling together – your relationship in itself will inevitably change. You reach a new level of commitment and often times, that means the excitement won’t always be there every single day. That’s not to say that it’s gone forever – it’s just not there every waking moment of your life together.

Sure, some days you’ll be excited to see your partner after work or school, other days, you’ll both be exhausted and barely speak because all you want to do is go to bed. It’s natural – it’s not a red flag, it’s nothing to worry about. It took me a very long time to learn this truth.

One person on Tumblr perfectly summed up the truth behind reaching this point in long-term relationships – and, it could not be truer.

Honestly – preach. I needed to read this – to fully understand and appreciate this chapter in my relationship and, I’m sure other people do, too.

If You Fall for Me, I Need You to Be Real with Me And Take Me Seriously

Is There A Dating Rule Book?

 

I used to think that there was a rule book for dating. 

You had to wait a certain number of days before calls or a set number of hours to text back. You had to have it all together or at least appear like you do. I thought you had to say the right things and make all the right moves at the right times.

 

When it came to dating, I thought that you had to calculate your every move.

You couldn’t be overeager because then you would look needy. You couldn’t be too much of anything right off the bat because it would make you look desperate or unattractive. But, I think that’s a load of crap. All of it. 

 

I refuse to let my love life be dictated by a rule book made to censor my true self in hopes of acceptance. 

Because, if I’m going to date you, you need to see the real me. You need to see the awkward, quirky, imperfect mess.

You need to know that if I enjoy your company, I’m going to tell you. I’m not always going to say the right things. I’m not always going to look as put together as that filtered photo you saw of me.

 

I Never Thought Love Was Real, Now I Think Life Isn’t Real Without It

“I feel like I’m in the wrong world. Cause I don’t belong in a world where we don’t end up together. I don’t. There are parallel universes out there where this didn’t happen. Where I was with you, and you were with me. And whatever universe that is, that’s the one where my heart lives in.”

I don’t recall a time, even when I was younger, that I ever truly believed in love. I never dreamed of my wedding or my prince charming, or in my case, my princess while growing up.

The concept of love was something that I could never grasp; I think it was because love is something that wasn’t concrete, I couldn’t hold on to it to make sure it couldn’t go anywhere. That scared me.

I could never imagine myself falling in love with anther human being, loving that person more than anything in the world. I couldn’t imagine giving myself to someone else, trusting them not to hurt me, not to break me.

 

Until you walked into my life.

I remember when we first met and I felt all these things that I’ve never felt before; it was all new and exciting to me.

 

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