1 And 4

You made me fit into a class that I never thought I would, I am now considered to be 1 of 4 women who struggle with the aftermath of a sexual trauma.

 

I however, will never be considered your victim. Instead I survived. 

 

That survival has come with many emotions the first of which being anger. I am angry that the event even happened. And I am angry that I am the one that has to deal with the aftermath of your actions. I am angry that there was nothing that I could have done differently to change the outcome of that day. And I am angry that if it had not been that day, I am confident that it would have been another day, time and place. And I am angry that you had no care about my safety. All you could see was the power that you needed to hold over me. You only thought about the gratification that you would feel after it was over. You only cared about what you wanted and that is not fair. 

 

 

Loving A Survivor

Loving a Survivor

Surviving an assault is one of the hardest things to go through personally. However, I think loving a survivor is probably the second hardest part. There are a lot of moving parts in recovering, and it is a journey that is going to have a lot of ups and a lot of downs. It takes a strong person to help love someone through this journey. So this is a little appreciation post to those who love us through the journey of recovering. Those who love us from victim to survivor. 

 

You are understanding

This is a journey that has been one of me trying to figure out how to put the pieces back together. I know that sometimes it probably feels that my life is all consumed by this journey. It probably is. However, you never make me feel like I am wrong for putting myself first. You are always so supportive whether that means holding me when I want to fall apart, or just having a chill day doing something fun because I need to be out of my head. 

 

You Listen

Although I have never told you what exactly happened because I am just not there yet, you listen to me vent. I dance around the issue but that does not seem to bother you. You sit there and listen to my worries and troubles. After you give me a hug and you never make me feel like I am crazy. 

 

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