I think very few of us can say that 2016 was a good year. For most of us, it was full of disappointments, heart break, and too many entertainers’ deaths. Not to mention the hideous and annoying trends we never asked for. Here’s to hoping they die the moment the NYC ball drops and we ring in 2017.
Stuffing other food into pizza.
For some reason, this year, there have been a million videos of pizza being violated by other fatty foods. And I know I can't be the only one grossed out. Or maybe I'm just a traditionalist. But if I wanted a hamburger, I would eat a hamburger. It doesn’t need to be stuffed into a pizza.
Acting like being petty is cool.
Being petty is something we always did, but when 2k16 hit, it became the thing to do. But being petty is actually pretty shitty, so let’s stop.
Extreme contouring videos.
I really don’t want to see you draw 30 dicks on your face and then brush them out. Let’s not and say we did, okay?
Snapchat and Facebook chains
NOPE. I can’t believe this trend has even started back up. I thought we left these behind ten years ago. The people that send these chains to me all must think I’m the worst because I never send them back.
Unicorns.
Unless you loved unicorns before 2016, I am judging you. Unicorns aren’t that cool, but since everything you can imagine has a unicorn on it, millions of people have jumped on the band wagon.
Being a psycho girlfriend is cool.
"I’m pretty but I’m loco?" Admitting that you are a control freak and green with jealousy is cool only if you are taking steps to change those things about yourself. It’s not cool when you continue to be a goddamn psycho.
Pokémon Go.
I’m sorry guys, but it’s dead. No more chasing Pokémon (especially when you are a grown ass adult) and somehow believing you will be losing weight by the pounds. It’s just not happening, and I think we all know there are better things to spend your time doing. Like actually working out, maybe?
Trying to be “slim-thick.”
I will tell you how to be slim-thick. You get slim and then pay for some implants. The only other way slim thick exists is if it’s in your genes. Otherwise, you’re SOL. It’s just not going to happen.
Emoji everything.
Poop slippers. Emoji pillows. Pizza earrings. We get it, you like texting. Can we please let the emojis just live in peace inside our iPhones? They're cheesy, and I'm pretty sure the person you bought that emoji gift for this Christmas was disappointed.
Harambe.
R-I-P. But seriously, rest in peace. No more taking shots for Harambe because “he took a shot for you.” No more “dicks out for Harambe.” – who even thought this was a thing to say? It was sad. The poor gorilla shouldn’t have gone out like that. But it's time we just let Harambe be dead.
Treating the binge lightly.
Bingeing is not cool. Binge eating, specifically. It means we have no self-control and no discipline. Let’s quit stuffing our faces and eat responsibly because you say you binge and then other people take it too far. Next thing we know we all got the diabeatus.
“I woke up like this.”
No, you really didn’t. Your face is caked with makeup, and you thought your snapchat friends wouldn’t notice? Stop trying to play ‘cause we know. Let’s just let this phrase die along with 2016.
Bottle-flipping.
It’s lame so let’s let it go.
Hair gummies and tea-tox instagram ads.
Oh my god. Please, stop. I am not going to buy your gummies, especially when every post is followed by #ad.
Chokers and every other 90’s trend that tried to come back this year.
It died in the 90’s because we wanted it to stay there. Let’s stop the slips over the t-shirts, the plastic chokers, and the denim jackets with a million pins on them. We brought them back for a year, and a year was already way too long.
Did I miss any trends that you hated this year? Let me know on my Facebook page!